WAAH! I can't reread this! The attachments don't work!

they dont work for me ether, i wanted to read them aswell,:<

Bump. Again. Finally got internet back after it went down during summer.

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Internet problems fixed...

Looks like I'm back.

hmmmmrrrrrrrrrrrrrAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUGH!!!!!! bump. *sniff* I want the next chappy...

Overlord you gotta give us a heads up!

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Telemnar’s Tale: Rebirth Chapter R: Recap and Recall The world is full of stones, every individual, every creature within a world; even the gods themselves have their own story. But it takes a special individual to bind these small stories together until they form a story big enough to change the world. This is the tale of one such individual, the god Telemnar. The god who once arose as the one destined to face the god Nemesis who reigned terror down upon the lands of Eden. Telemnar brought peace and harmony to Eden and when the world no longer needed him he vanished from it. Awakened from slumber many generations later, summoned by the cries of his people. He returned to save them from the brink of destruction in a time where war holds Eden in its grip. Gods and mortals alike draw weapons in an attempt to conquer a now divided Eden. Telemnar saved his people at the hands of ‘the Serpent’ and led them to victory in the land of Egypt against ‘the claws of Jukhra.’ But he has met a much deadlier foe in the form of the god called Melfice and the Clan of . However Telemnar is not alone in his quest, this time he has the Council of on his side and his followers behind him. Darius his loyal, trustworthy general and Odon his ancient high priest who holds many years of wisdom. Omi, Odon’s grandson and a righteous solider of Telemnar’s army, as well as Ainia, a young but fierce Amazonian warrior with a heart of gold. Also traveling with him are the gods Rena, goddess of the Amazonians; and Khonsu, the young Egyptian gods who helped him defeat the evil Egyptian god Jukhra. Our story finds the group journeying into the frozen north lands in pursuit of the Melfice and the next member of the Clan of . Meanwhile the council had amassed to face the army that Melfice has sent against them with the intent of wiping them out in Telemnar’s absence… “All shall be protected under the Wings of Telemnar” (What that’s it? You go missing for months and this is all you come back with? Where’s Chapter 31? And what’s with all this re-introduction junk? I mean, come on! A three year old could write better then this!)-Demon *The ‘Giant Rubber for the Removal of Annoying Fictional Characters’ appears* (Uh…I mean…Welcome Back Boss! to see ya! Can’t wait for some more of that great material! Uh…can we have chapter 31 soon though please…)-Demon

Took your time, didn't you? Fortunately, I am not a fictional character (even though I might be annoying), so deliver chapter 31, darn it!

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*Arrives in a burst of flame* What can I say? I love a flashy entrance You're right of course Solar, which is why I bought this... *Shoulders 'Bazooka for the Removal of Annoying Solars'* This is Telemnar coming to you from his uni where he is undertaking an engineering degree, rather then waste time with the 101 excuses I have for this year (I'll need a fresh set for 2007) I am here to say chapter 31 will be up shortly. After some PM's from new readers however it has become clear to me that the links to my older chapters no longer work, and so just before 31 goes up, the previous chapters will be reposted in order that they can be read by all.

You do realise that will take a number of posts, correct? A single post has a character limit, as I found out a while ago. And the purchase you made (the bazooka) is rather useless. There's only one true Solar, and that's me! Well, you had better get posting then. I won't forgive you if you slack again! And I'm a filthy hypocrite. =P

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Understood on both the posting and slacking accounts, however the bazooka is multi-dimensional in order to deal with alternate reality solars and any other sun related god or being, as well as your garden variety solars (you) . *'Target is viable, weapon primed and ready for launch'*

Stop fighting, start writing, and welcome back Overlord! "However Telemnar is not alone in his quest, this time he has the Council of on his side and his followers behind him. Darius his loyal, trustworthy general and Odon his ancient high priest who holds many years of wisdom. Omi, Odon’s grandson and a righteous solider of Telemnar’s army, as well as Ainia, a young but fierce Amazonian warrior with a heart of gold." -> "However Telemnar is not alone in his quest, this time he has the Council of on his side and his followers behind him: Darius his loyal, trustworthy general, and Odon his ancient high priest who holds many years of wisdom; Omi, Odon’s grandson and righteous solider of Telemnar’s army, as well as Ainia, a young but fierce Amazonian warrior with a heart of gold." "Also traveling with..." -> "Also travelling with..." Other than that, well done.

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Internet problems fixed...

Looks like I'm back.

*wakes from extremely long nap* Ugh... Overlord's alive? I was worried he got hit by a car or something, glad that's not the case and welcome back... you know I just realised that every time Overlord dissapears for awhile I assume he's dead... how odd

 Quoting: mirumoto_shenshi

*wakes from extremely long nap* Ugh... Overlord's alive? I was worried he got hit by a car or something, glad that's not the case and welcome back... you know I just realised that every time Overlord dissapears for awhile I assume he's dead... how odd

Very odd. I never thought such a thing. But that might be because he periodically appears on MSN. That said... Overlord, where's the damned chapter?

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LE GASP!! The story updated And i missed it AIEEE!! *goes into grammer mode* The world is full of stones--->I assume you mean stories here Khonsu, the young Egyptian gods---> the young egyptian god into the frozen north lands …--->northlands I feel like being ammy today *wanders off*

 Quoting: Khelder

"Also traveling with..." -> "Also travelling with..."

Both are correct forms of the verb 'to travel'. 'Travelling' is chiefly British, and 'Traveling' is what Americans made of it, probably because the double 'l' is mute .

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Bathing in eternal sunlight...

{Sig Made By SenileSkunk!}

And Overlord and I are both of the British persuasion! ¬_¬ *Cue "Land of Hope and Glory"*

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Internet problems fixed...

Looks like I'm back.

lol No I'm not dead, I hope not anyway *checks* No I'm still alive Anyway the older chapters will be reposted soon, but I decided I'd get 31 out the way first. Yes it has mistakes, probably plenty and a more then healthy use of the comma. That's just the way it is, you put up with that, and I put up with reading your corrections. I know Ammy is amazing with proof-reading, but while things are settling, until they are settled I just get them done and posted. Perfectionism comes to those with the time to afford it. Telemnar’s Tale: Key to the Fallen Star Saga Chapter 31: Battle Lines Drawn The hull of the first ship ground to a halt on the gently shores of the realm and planks were lowered to allow the ships passengers to disembark. As the other ships came to rest alongside the lead ship, a General stopped to inspect the landscape. The sand here was soft and golden beneath his feet; the waves they had sailed in on were a deep blue and the emerald grass spread away into expansive fields. This place was very different to the land they had come from, where grey waves crashed against a dry barren shore. Other soldiers around him were already unloading supplies and setting up camp. Stakes were hammered into the ground, tents were raised and weapons were prepared. The general glanced towards the ship that held the creatures and snorted. No matter, he thought, this land would be the same as theirs once it came under the hand of their master. On the edge of Rena’s realm the canopy of trees gave way to a forest of a different kind. Rows of spears reached towards the sky above, shields spreading out like leaves around them. Here were gathered the remaining forces of the Alliances realms, under the command of the council. Aurorus stood with a handful of gods at the head of this small army, gazing grimly out towards the horizon. Deziel approached Aurorus, a look of deep concern still evident on the young god’s face. ‘They landed on the north peninsula my lord, and have set on camp on the fields of Avalon’ he reported. Aurorus continued to watch the horizon in silence for several minutes before he spoke up ‘Have all citizens been evacuated from the settlements to the north?’ The young god, who had been shifting his weight from foot to foot in the uneasy silence, snapped to attention. ‘Yes sir!’ he responded, saluting smartly in an over eager attempt to show the elder god respect. ‘’ Aurorus replied, ‘Then we shall meet them on the fields of Avalon.’ A group of thieves edged themselves along the ledge, their backs pressed up against the cliff face as they made the treacherous climb. The mountains peak was lost in the heavy cloud layer overhead, the chilling winds and icy slopes making the already treacherous climb almost impossible. As with most places that are notoriously difficult to reach, rumours had sprung up about ancient treasures and mystical guardians. And as with all such places, there were always those who would forgo the warnings and face the dangers in the slightest hope of satisfying their greed. Inch by inch the thieves climbed the steep rocks towards the slight opening in the mountainside where untold treasures were said to lie. With a final grunt of effort, the first of the thieves wrapped his now numb fingers around the frozen ledge and he pulled himself into relative shelter of the cave mouth. Soon the thieves stood huddled together in the cavernous opening, brushing sleet from their cloaks and rubbing warmth back into their limbs. One of them produced a dry, wooden torch from deep within their robes, and striking a piece of flint against the cave wall, lit it. The light illuminated strange patterns that ran along the cave walls and seemed to produce their own ominous green glow against the torchlight. The thieves slowly negotiated the winding passage, checking every inch for possible booby traps, but the way lay clear. This disappointed the thieves somewhat, as they firmly believed that every hidden treasure trove worth its salt was full of booby traps. As they progressed through the tunnels the air around them grew heavy as did their disappointment at how easy this seemed after the climb. After some time they emerged in an oval cavern that appeared to be central treasure chamber and stopped dead in their tracks. For a moment quiet disappointment hung in the air while frustration slowly brought their tempers to boiling point. ‘Will you look at this junk?!’ One of the thieves screamed ‘Nothing but some useless piece of grey metal on a pedestal!’ The other thieves stared blankly around the room and had to agree with him, the room appeared to be empty apart from the small, misshapen lump, no gold, no silver, no jewels. The thief who had spoken snorted, ‘Ha, what a waste of our time. The treasure’s as phoney as the guardian that supposedly protects it.’ ‘I’M AFRAID I WOULD HAVE TO DISAGREE THERE’ a voice behind them said. The thieves froze and stood rooted to the spot, exchanging glances. Now it is commonly know that in such a situation you are to slowly and quietly make your way to the nearest exit, the one thing you mustn’t do being to turn round and see what is behind you. As one they turned to look behind them. Several moments later they ran screaming from the cave mouth, some even jumping towards layers of snow many feet below in order to hasten their escape. Back in the cave the guardian was having a coughing fit and lowered himself onto a conveniently placed boulder, wheezing heavily, in order to catch his breath. ‘OH DEAR, I’M GETTING TOO OLD FOR THIS’ he groaned and went back to his long held duty of guarding the mountains treasure. Aurorus still stood gazing out across the landscape, the soldiers were going about the preparations for battle and the gods were supervising, lending a hand wherever they could. There was the heavy scent of smoke in the air, even over such a distance he could smell the campfires where food was being prepared and the forges where iron was being shaped. Wacipi appeared as silently as a shadow beside Aurorus, a movement which was contrary to her very nature. ‘What do you really think our chances are?’ she asked abruptly, breaking the dreaded silence that hung over the fields before a battle. Aurorus’ face remained calm as he replied in a voice that only he and Wacipi could hear ‘I don’t know, they come in great numbers and they do not appear to have a god among them.’ He paused and the in silence that followed Wacipi picked up his trail of thought. ‘However, you don’t believe that Melfice would send a godless army against the stronghold of the gods unless he had some sort of trump card’ she finished with a knowing smile. Aurorus made a brief grimace at the impudence of young gods now days before he replied with a brief nod. The fields of Avalon covered much of the northern peninsula of this land, an almost endless stretch of open green fields on which a scattering of settlements existed. In the height of the summer that had settled over the land, this was complimented by the golden fields of crop and the many mottled coloured coats of the animals that freely grazed the landscape. As the day grew older though, the brilliant blue of the summer sky was altered by the addition of a small, rising column of grey. The air temperature steadily grew and the wildlife fled as the choking smog rolled across the fields. The General watched the village burn as the flimsy wooden structures was engulfed by the ravenous flames. Soldiers were running everyone, torches lit, bellowing war cries and creating destruction wherever they went. The General looked on as the fire spread to the surrounding fields, there had been no causalities, this village had been as empty as the last. The were slowly making their way down the peninsula, making sure to eradicate anything they came across on their way. Judging the resistance they had faced so far it was clear that the gods had been alerted to their presence and an army would doubtlessly be lying near by in wait. He looked around at the eager faces, filled with the pre-battle blood lust and sighed as he saw their lack of restraint. This is what had become of his people was it, the blood-thirsty rabble under a demonic god. Of course this opinion was one he would never voice aloud, not if he valued his life. He wasn’t even sure such a thought was safe inside the confines of his own head. The structure nearest him collapsed and he observed as the embers leapt into the sky before flickering out of existence. As he thought this he reflected on the many wars they had fought and won since that time, and he couldn’t deny that it had given them an edge in battle. He looked over to where the creatures lay chained in a row, woven sacks tied over their heads and under the watchful eye of the Beast master. This was his master’s insurance policy, the thing guaranteed to win against the gods. Just looking at them caused the General to give an involuntary shiver, he hoped they would be rid of them soon, just their presence gave him the creeps. Ice splintered under the ships bow as it slid through the frigid water, icicles hanging from the mast, the sail gently flapping in the chilly northern wind. A few guards huddled on the deck, wrapped heavily in thick woollen blankets. Most of the others were below deck, crowding around the warmth of a small fire that Khonsu had started and that Tidus was maintaining within a shield to prevent it spreading to the ship. I was on the prow of the ship, watching the effect of the cold on mortal skin with interest. Ryudo lay snoozing nearby, his thick fur coat providing him with adequate protection against the chill of the air. As I watched him sleep it occurred to me that he had grown again in both height and build. He was developing a greater degree of muscle too, the recent battles adding new layers of sinew to his frame. I turned my view back towards our destination, lost to mortals in the frost curtained air. However these parted for me and I could see frozen shores lay only a short distance away, soon they would arrive in a new land. There was a trace of something in the air, I had been expecting it. The same sensation I had felt when we had first entered Jukhra’s realm, it was the scent of Melfice, or something like him. As I stood there, gazing into the mist, there was a sudden creak under my feet and the ship juddered to a halt, nearly throwing me overboard. I had been so lost in my daydreaming I hadn’t even notice as we had crossed that short distance to the frigid coastline. The soldiers rushed up on deck as the other ships drew up alongside us and dropped anchor. There was the general mummer of excitement from the crew that came with every new land we encountered and it was possible that among those voices were those my friends and allies, but I paid no attention. The feeling had grown stronger and I could feel it pulling me onto the land, helpless to do anything but answer the call. Ignoring all those around me, I leapt over the side of the ship and deaf to the cries of those who saw me leaving I marched off into the swirling snow. A solitary figure made it’s way through the ruined village, one hand clasping an injured arm, it’s steps staggered. It was the escaped creature of Melfice’s army and it knew not by what fortune it had been washed back to north lands from which it had been taken. It wandered aimlessly, half-dead from fatigue, through a place it did not recognise, but which reeked of blood and death. It was alone, many miles from the caves it had once called home, for so long it had been driven by the singular idea of escape, but now it didn’t know what to do. As the wind howled around it, the creature huddled in what shelter a burnt out house provided and let it’s grasp of consciousness slip. So deep was its sleep among the wreckage of the building that it failed to stir even at the sound of heavy footsteps on the packed snow several hours later. The god’s army shifted nervously in front of the forest, ripples spreading out among the ranks of swords, spears, bows and shields. Aurorus could understand their discomfort, the enemy army had been sighted, just on the edge of mortal vision, a dark outline against the horizon. However according to their scouts they were making no hurry to move forward as of yet and had even set up camp in the afternoon light. ‘What do you suppose they’re up to?’ Wacipi asked, once again appearing at his side with little more then a gentle breeze announcing her presence. ‘I don’t know’ Aurorus said, worry lining his face, ‘Maybe they’re trying to draw us into doing something foolish or to make us slip into a false sense of security.’ They stood in silence, for once Wacipi not offer her own opinion, but awaiting Aurorus’ judgement. ‘For the moment let us play along’ he said at last, ‘let the men set up camp and get a chance to rest.’ As Wacipi turned to go, Aurorus grasped her shoulder firmly and added ‘but make sure they keep their weapons close to hand, and I want all gods alert for the first move.’ She nodded and left to fulfil his orders, leaving him alone to watch the dark dot on the horizon that was their enemy. They began to move again as the sun fell from the sky and the full moon rose to fill the heavens in its place. The army was alerted and they were assembled in their ranks before the enemy was within charging distance. The enemy stopped in their tracks, for there seemed some commotion coming from the back as a large, unkempt man came to the head of the enemy army. Behind him followed what appeared to be slaves chained together in a long line. These bedraggled people in dirt-encrusted rags, with sacks tied over their heads were brought to the front and placed in a line before the front rank of troops. Were they to be used as a human shield for the soldiers? Aurorus shuddered at the thought of it, but as the sacks were removed from their heads, he found that was quite wrong… I knew not how long I had wandered, though the sun high above told me it was still daylight in this part of the world, or what it was that had compelled me to leave my friends so far behind me. I eventually found myself at what I could guess had once been a village or even a town, but now was a crumbling shell. Here and there parts of the large wooden walls remained, but they offered no protection to this lifeless place. The buildings had either been set alight or torn open leaving few places that not open to the elements. The winds had died down some time ago and now the snow had settled like a blanket over the landscape as if wishing to cover up what had taken place here. I wandered on past the wreckage of what once would have been people’s homes and stopped in my tracks as I heard snow nearby shifting. So, not entirely lifeless then? The snow erupted around me and several men in heavy fur cloaks pounced from where they had lain hidden, brandishing an assortment of cruel looking weapons. I drew my sword in time to block the first lunge and twisted away to dodge the second, my own weapon coming down on the attackers arm, forcing him to drop his. They were in close and had me surrounded, giving them the advantage, I didn’t have the space to cast any miracles and they were attacking frantically. I threw back my elbow, breaking the nose of the guy behind me and I used this chance to leap backwards, putting distance between myself and them. As I released a volley of fireballs that had them diving for cover, one dropped from the roof above, his axe whistling through the air towards my head. I spun to block this attack, but before I could something large and furry burst from the snow and ploughed into the attacker. As the sacks where removed, the captives blinked in the moonlight and then as their faces were drawn to the sky above them, they began to shake uncontrollably. Aurorus watched, his eyes wide with horror, as they seemed to fall into some sort of trance, their eyes focused on the moon above as their bodies took on a life on their own. Muscles bulged until the shackles binding them shattered, their hair became long and coarse, engulfing their whole body. Nails and teeth grew long and sharp until they were replaced by fang and claw as their bodies changed shape. Finally the last scraps of their clothing fell to the ground around them as Aurorus realised they chilling truth. They had not been a human shield for the front line, they WERE the front line… “All shall be protected under the Wings of Telemnar” (‘What? You call that drama?’)-Demon (‘I rather liked it’)-Beardy (‘Oh come on, all they need to do to win this battle is throw a stick for the lot of them, they’re not taking this as a serious threat?’)-Demon (‘This battle is supposedly going to be a pretty big one’)-Beardy (‘Well it better be, if I don’t see at least a 7 page chapter of blood and guts next chapter, I’m coming for you Mr. Author!’)-Demon *Sulking* (‘Why do you keep threatening the Author, you never win’)-Beardy (‘Oh come on what can he really do to me?)-Demon (‘Well he could right a big ‘kick me’ sign on your back and place Ryudo behind you’)-Beardy (‘What makes you think he’d do that?’)-Demon (‘Oh nothing really, morning Ryudo’)-Beardy (‘Yeah, morning Ryudo…wait…ahhh!…)-Demon *Flies over the imaginary horizon* (So that’s what about Author 4, Demon 0 now…)-Beardy

 Quoting: OVERLORDX

Telemnar’s Tale: Key to the Fallen Star Saga Chapter 31: Battle Lines Drawn The hull of the first ship ground to a halt on the gentle shores of the realm and planks were lowered to allow the ship's passengers to disembark. As the other ships came to rest alongside the lead ship, a General stopped to inspect the landscape. The sand here was soft and golden beneath his feet; the waves they had sailed in on were a deep blue and the emerald grass spread away into expansive fields. This place was very different to the land they had come from, where grey waves crashed against a dry barren shore. Other soldiers around him were already unloading supplies and setting up camp. Stakes were hammered into the ground, tents were raised and weapons were prepared. The general glanced towards the ship that held the creatures and snorted. No matter, he thought, this land would be the same as theirs once it came under the hand of their master. ... After some time they emerged in an oval cavern that appeared to be central treasure chamber and stopped dead in their tracks. For a moment quiet disappointment hung in the air while frustration slowly brought their tempers to boiling point. ‘Will you look at this junk?!’ One of the thieves screamed ‘Nothing but some useless piece of grey metal on a pedestal!’ The other thieves stared blankly around the room and had to agree with him, the room appeared to be empty apart from the small, misshapen lump, no gold, no silver, no jewels. The thief who had spoken snorted, ‘Ha, what a waste of our time. The treasure’s as phoney as the guardian that supposedly protects it.’ ‘I’M AFRAID I WOULD HAVE TO DISAGREE THERE’ a voice behind them said. The thieves froze and stood rooted to the spot, exchanging glances. Now it is commonly know that in such a situation you are to slowly and quietly make your way to the nearest exit, the one thing you mustn’t do being to turn round and see what is behind you. As one they turned to look behind them. Several moments later they ran screaming from the cave mouth, some even jumping towards layers of snow many feet below in order to hasten their escape. Back in the cave the guardian was having a coughing fit and lowered himself onto a conveniently placed boulder, wheezing heavily, in order to catch his breath. ‘OH DEAR, I’M GETTING TOO OLD FOR THIS’ he groaned and went back to his long held duty of guarding the mountain's treasure. ... The General watched the village burn as the flimsy wooden structures was engulfed by the ravenous flames. Soldiers were running everyone, torches lit, bellowing war cries and creating destruction wherever they went. The General looked on as the fire spread to the surrounding fields, there had been no causalities, this village had been as empty as the last. The were slowly making their way down the peninsula, making sure to eradicate anything they came across on their way. Judging the resistance they had faced so far it was clear that the gods had been alerted to their presence and an army would doubtlessly be lying near by in wait. He looked around at the eager faces, filled with the pre-battle blood lust and sighed as he saw their lack of restraint. This is what had become of his people was it, the blood-thirsty rabble under a demonic god. Of course this opinion was one he would never voice aloud, not if he valued his life. He wasn’t even sure such a thought was safe inside the confines of his own head. The structure nearest to him collapsed and he observed as the embers leapt into the sky before flickering out of existence. As he thought this he reflected on the many wars they had fought and won since that time, and he couldn’t deny that it had given them an edge in battle. He looked over to where the creatures lay chained in a row, woven sacks tied over their heads and under the watchful eye of the Beast master. This was his master’s insurance policy, the thing guaranteed to win against the gods. Just looking at them caused the General to give an involuntary shiver, he hoped they would be rid of them soon, just their presence gave him the creeps. ... The gods' (It's the army of a multitude of gods, not just a single one, correct?) army shifted nervously in front of the forest, ripples spreading out among the ranks of swords, spears, bows and shields. Aurorus could understand their discomfort, the enemy army had been sighted, just on the edge of mortal vision, a dark outline against the horizon. However according to their scouts they were making no hurry to move forward as of yet and had even set up camp in the afternoon light. ‘What do you suppose they’re up to?’ Wacipi asked, once again appearing at his side with little more then a gentle breeze announcing her presence. ‘I don’t know’ Aurorus said, worry lining his face, ‘Maybe they’re trying to draw us into doing something foolish or to make us slip into a false sense of security.’ They stood in silence, for once Wacipi not offering her own opinion, but awaiting Aurorus’ judgement. ‘For the moment let us play along’ he said at last, ‘let the men set up camp and get a chance to rest.’ As Wacipi turned to go, Aurorus grasped her shoulder firmly and added ‘but make sure they keep their weapons close to hand, and I want all gods alert for the first move.’ She nodded and left to fulfil his orders, leaving him alone to watch the dark dot on the horizon that was their enemy. ...

Some very quick pointing out of errors. Probably failed to spot them all though. Still, take a good look over there. Also, if you have to use capitals for loud voices, only use it for the screaming voice, like: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! STOP KILLING MY MEN!" Preferably not for a voice merely talking or groaning. I'd advise you to use bold text in cases where the person/creature/whatever-it-is says something normally but in a louder voice than the average person. All in all, an excellent and highly enjoyable chapter. I look forward to the next one!

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Solar: I believe he was using the capitals in much the same way as Terry Pratchett used BOLD CAPITALS for the voice of Death - to show a deep, resounding, bone-chilling voice. So, Overlord, I know you said that you over-used the comma, but

Now it is commonly know that in such a situation you are to slowly and quietly make your way to the nearest exit

should ideally be

Now, it is commonly known that, in such a situation, you are to slowly and quietly make your way to the nearest exit

and

He paused and the in silence that followed Wacipi picked up his trail of thought.

should be

He paused, and in the silence that followed Wacipi picked up his trail of thought.

and again

he groaned and went back to his long held duty of guarding the mountains treasure.

becomes

he groaned, and went back to his long held duty of guarding the mountains treasure.

and so on. To agree with you though,

The General looked on as the fire spread to the surrounding fields, there had been no causalities, this village had been as empty as the last.

should be

The General looked on as the fire spread to the surrounding fields, there had been no causalities - this village had been as empty as the last.

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Internet problems fixed...

Looks like I'm back.

Capitals are an iffy thing... Most writers will avoid using capped speech, because it sounds lame and childish when done incorrectly. I haven't read the chapter (finally getting something done on my own stuff, so I'm continuing that first ) so I can't say if it's being used well or not, but I'm counting on your expertise to solve the matter, Overlord. My advice is: find another way to anticipate annoyance such as us pointing this out to you , or make sure that you do it in such a way that it unmistakably fits the context.

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Bathing in eternal sunlight...

{Sig Made By SenileSkunk!}

Thank you people, as always advice taken and dually noted. I'll try to take more time and care over the next one (though I promise not as much time as 31 was in coming). You will find less mistakes in that one then in this one I am assured, or at least it is my aim and a good one to go by in improving the quality of my story. And finally thank you to Khelder, for picking out my use of Capitals as a homage to my favourite Discworld character. This is not the last we have seen of the guardian, but it will be a while before he appears again and by then I will have decided between use of capitals or possibly swapping to bold.

Bold seems more appropriate if you ask me... Just a hint... *whistles* Oh, and keep up the job!

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Bathing in eternal sunlight...

{Sig Made By SenileSkunk!}

I agree with Ammy, both on the bold thing, and on the good work thing.

Hurray! chapter and I know its the one leading up to the large epic battle ahead, so can't wait to see how this will turn out. As always, I shall continue to root for you and smack you upside the head when its taking forever to crank out another chapter. I seem to find myself with some free time at the moment, its making me consider throwing out another short story for the boards. Then I remember Amaunator is lurking around, which is like a Nun and Jaws put together in one strange ultimate grammar being.

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Ha! Ammy's a Nun-Shark