Norriefpb:

jazzx:

Jazz (surprise, surprise) is my thing - but I recently joined a Soul-funk-latin band full time ("Casa del Funk") - great fun.

Fun like a TMO collaboration? Or fun where the singer has to "deviate from the main melody and improvise"?
Just curious mate.

Norrie

Fun as in the band gets everyone on the dance floor and shows them a time (which makes it a time for us in return).

Mind you, I find jazz fun as well - but in a different way - especially when you have a rhythm section.

---

jazzx:

Norriefpb:

jazzx:

Jazz (surprise, surprise) is my thing - but I recently joined a Soul-funk-latin band full time ("Casa del Funk") - great fun.

Fun like a TMO collaboration? Or fun where the singer has to "deviate from the main melody and improvise"?
Just curious mate.

Norrie

Fun as in the band gets everyone on the dance floor and shows them a time (which makes it a time for us in return).

Mind you, I find jazz fun as well - but in a different way - especially when you have a rhythm section.

I swear to God [sic] Jazzx, you would not know fun if it came up and bit you in the arse.

Hi Jazzx!

This thread is a very idea, it's nice to see those old movies. you make a great job, it's important for the ccommunity. I have several of those movies in my hard drive as Cleopartra and A new world. I didn't wach the second part of Into the shadow by sherwinliu, I'll watch it after my holidays.

It's kind of you to put my movie in that list and thank you to create a link on rapidshare. So, I've uploaded the first part of The Sundance in high quality with the second part. If you or Orky are interested, here's the link : http://www.vimeo.com/user385845 

See you!

Cine

---

The Movies FR - The french speaking sommunity: http://www.themovies.fr


wiwanyank Wacipi - The Sundance - Part 1 & 2 in high quality here : http://www.vimeo.com/user385845

cinecitta:

Hi Jazzx!

This thread is a very idea, it's nice to see those old movies. you make a great job, it's important for the ccommunity. I have several of those movies in my hard drive as Cleopartra and A new world. I didn't wach the second part of Into the shadow by sherwinliu, I'll watch it after my holidays.

It's kind of you to put my movie in that list and thank you to create a link on rapidshare. So, I've uploaded the first part of The Sundance in high quality with the second part. If you or Orky are interested, here's the link : http://www.vimeo.com/user385845 

See you!

Cine

Hi-res! Superb ...

I'm having trouble finding out how to download the files - it would be nice to replace the old versions with these glossy new ones.

Any chance of putting them on rapidshare?

I'm a great fan of hi-res - the archive currently has these films in Hi-Res:

"Instinct" by Throwaxe

"The Dead Cases" (both parts) by Jase180

"To TMO or Not to TMO" by rileyman

"For My Fellow Soldier" by rileyman

"May Flowers" by josephkw

"The Deed of Midnight - Chapter 1" (Acts I & II) by Trewill7

"The God Illusion - Root of all Ills? Part 1: Unintelligent Design" by JazzX

"5 Stars (Music Video)" by JazzX


So I'd love to add "Wiwanyank Wacipi" to that list.

---

I'm a newbie on vimeo and I don't find how to download , it's a little strange . So, I'll upload it on rapidshare when I'll come home (I leave tomorrow in holidays). I'll send you a PM with the link. Thank you for your interest .

Cine

---

The Movies FR - The french speaking sommunity: http://www.themovies.fr


wiwanyank Wacipi - The Sundance - Part 1 & 2 in high quality here : http://www.vimeo.com/user385845

cinecitta:

I'm a newbie on vimeo and I don't find how to download , it's a little strange . So, I'll upload it on rapidshare when I'll come home (I leave tomorrow in holidays). I'll send you a PM with the link. Thank you for your interest .

Cine

Great! - Thanks a lot.

I'll put the link up here as well when it comes through.

---

So - this month we whizz back to March 2007 - a golden month for Sci-fi on TMO. Join me again as I boldly take you through a galaxy of TMO treats:


March 2007 Highlights

[C] = classic must-watch film



The Passage (episode 2) [C]

by josephkw

Genre: Military Sci-Fi

Duration: just over 15 minutes - released Monday 26th February 2007, 95 ratings, 4.98 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for mild violence and innuendo


The Passage continues, with a lengthy discussion of spirituality followed by a nail-biting space battle in an asteroid field. Something for everyone in this episode.




Press Play On Your Graduation Day

by Dulci

Genre: Monologue

Duration: 3.5 minutes - released Monday 5th March 2007, 102 ratings, 4.95 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


A terminally ill mother records a video message to her child. Another top class solo performance by Dulci - make sure you have a hankie on standby!





The Courage Within

The Courage Within II: "Redemption"

&

The Courage Within III: "Ouroboros"

by MefuneAkira

Genre: Action sci-fi

Durations:
nearly 6.5 minutes - released Thursday 27th July 2006, 164 ratings, 4.9 star average
11 minutes - released Friday 8th September 2006, 147 ratings, 4.96 star average
22.5 minutes - released Sunday 25th February 2007, 168 ratings, 4.97 star average

BBFC ratings:
(15) - for scenes of intense action violence,
(12) - for violent scenes,
(15) - for graphic violence and one use of bad language


This classy series ended up at the Rome film festival. It's got some great special effects in the battle scenes, an original score and equally original sci-fi concepts peppered throughout (my favourites are the alien spores that make you hallucinate and the brain implant that allows you to speak and understand any language just by thinking of a 4-digit pin number!)

Cleverly told throughout, it's a very entertaining story with quite a twist at the end (the clue is in the third episode's sub-title). Check out the quality acting from the rebel commander in every episode - one of many reasons to see this again and again.




Dark Thriller (French w. English subtitles)

by samyhouse

Genre: Supernatural Detective Thriller

Duration: nearly 18 minutes - released Thursday 8th March 2007, 150 ratings, 4.85 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for disturbing graphic images


This film has an outstanding performance from the lead, so that in my review I said "I reckon I would've understood him even without subtitles". Without giving too much away, it's mainly a detective story with some mutilated bodies providing the vital clues. But there's a supernatural element to things which makes this more than just another detective story.




Instinct [C]

by Throwaxe

Genre: Horror Sci-fi

Duration: 21 minutes - released Friday 9th March 2007, 80 ratings, 4.94 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for scary scenes and one humorous use of bad language


"In Space No-one Can Hear You Scream" - almost true until the very end (after the credits) of this film. Even a vacuum would carry poor Jeff's cry to the next galaxy! No male would disagree with me!

"Instinct" is an excellent film which I was priveleged enough to be given the starring role in. But it also stars most of the female voice actors of TMO (unfortunately not an exaggeration - I wish there were more). Where else will you find Dulci, Sisch, Myshinator, Riot007 and SailorKnightWing in one place? All dressed in skimpy sci-fi uniforms? An astonishing feat. Beautifully filmed and scored - there's one horror scene that deserves to be immortalised in TMO cinematic legend - and as such, I refuse to spoil it by explaining it here - but it occurs in the second half, and you'll know it when you watch it. It's NOT the brilliant special effects shot near the end.

As well as being scary, "Instinct" is genuinely funny in an understated way - and even has time for a debate on the merits (or otherwise) of vegetarianism! What's not to like? A TMO sci-fi classic.




Bikini Girl Fast Food Massacre

by stephenedler

Genre: So-bad-it's- Comedy

Duration: just over 2 minutes - released Sunday 8th January 2006, 18 ratings, 4.78 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for violence


This little-known comedy came courtesy of the random movie button. It is a really bad film - but in such a great way!
Many people have attempted to make a stupid-funny film on TMO. In my opinion, this is one of the few that succeeded thanks to its sharp gags and funny punchline. I mean, three scantily clad women walk into a diner and start shooting people because the male contingent are looking at their tits!!?? Maybe it only appeals to my sense of humour ... but the punchline explains all!



Suicide (German w. English subtitles)

by micha83

Genre: Psychological Horror

Duration: 6 minutes - released Wednesday 28th March 2007, 229 ratings, 4.75 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for disturbing scenes and bad language


A man's inner conscience persuades him whether or not to commit suicide after a particularly bad day. Superb acting and editing, the story is horrific to watch, but traditional in the sense that he has an angel telling him to not pull the trigger, and a d telling him the opposite. Who wins? WATCH NOW ...



Natural Occurance

by kuroken

Genre: Time Travel Thriller

Duration: 15 minutes - released Sunday 18th March 2007, 65 ratings, 4.98 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for mild violence


This is great. It's like Doctor Who meets Austin Powers - except Doctor Who is a female assassin and Austin Powers is just a normal bloke living in the 60s. Fantastic acting by the female lead and indeed by the lead male too, making this a sci-fi film not to be missed.



Tainted Souls - Episode I: Death, Doctors and Dreams

by jameseva

Genre: Supernatural Drama

Duration: 14 minutes - released Monday 19th March 2007, 104 ratings, 4.94 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


A bereaved son whose mother has just died tries to visit his father in Ravens Heights mental hospital. An interesting case of "bad doctor, doctor" follows. A very performance by josephkw as the mentally ill (or is he ?) father in this one. Certainly a great set-up for the next episode.


Interstellar Odyssey (Part One) [C]

by nukester

Genre: Exploratory Sci-fi

Duration: 26 minutes - released Friday 30th March 2007, 173 ratings, 4.95 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


TMO's answer to Stanley Kubrick and Arthur C. Clarke's classic, "2001: A Space Odyssey". But instead of beginning with some monkeys, they begin with me instead! My voice booms throughout the cosmos as it builds up to the ultimate question of existence, "W h y ?" - easily my favourite single-word performance in any film I've ever been in (and that's largely down to the director's mega-dramatic pause that he put in!). It was a pet desire of mine to get a "Star Trek" style opening VO - and my wish came true with this film - I milked it big time!

The film is great, building up slowly explaining what the characters are trying to do and how they're going to go about it. No mega space battles or aliens in the local bar, this is about man's first effort at going to another star system and we're treated to a detailed explanation of how the physics work. We're also shown how, in the 22nd century, women are held in less esteem than they are now - forced to wear extremely revealing costumes and subjected to butt-pinching comments at every turn! (Thank ness they lost all that 21st century PC crap!!) Vivian's introduction to the strains of one of my favourite latin jazz songs "Black Orpheus" (aka, "A Day in the Life of a Fool" [aka. "Manha de Carnivale"]) is priceless. A terrific performance by SailorKnightWing. The sexist commander also puts in a great showing.

It all builds up to an apparently catastrophic ending, but watch this space - because there is a second part to this classic TMO sci-fi film. And it will be featured in this thread...



Also archived this month:

"The Incredible Prestwick-man!"
"The Haloist II"
"The Night Hunter"
"Jaye Faye" (Episodes 1-3)
"Silent Hero: Hostage"
"Silent Hero: Darkness I"
"Silent Hero: Darkness II"
"EDS Destiny 6: Showdown"
"Why?"
"Smothered Hope"
"What Lurks in the Shadows (Director's Cut)"
"Abducted!"
"The Ringtone"
"Mars"
"The Path We Choose"
"Make Laugh Not War"
"Damnrealm 01"



That's all for now, there are now 685 films in the archive, the latest addition being Torqual's "Lost in the Forest: Episode 4".


See you next month!







 

---

Wow, IO (A butt pinching 2001) and Instinct (Agatha Cristie with a dose of womens lib on steriods) in the same month and The Night Hunter doesnt even get a highlight.  Thats some month.

---

Teaser out now

thebiz:

Wow, IO (A butt pinching 2001) and Instinct (Agatha Cristie with a dose of womens lib on steriods) in the same month and The Night Hunter doesnt even get a highlight.  Thats some month.

Yes - a big month. Took me a week to write that.

"The Night Hunter" was close - but I had problems with some of the Hollywood coincidences in the plot - like a very fortuitously placed can of petrol in a subway station (there aren't even any cars in a subway station)! Even luckier that the undead can only be consumed by fire! But the way it was acted and put together was very .

qtigger shouldn't be too disappointed, his film "Pressure" will be in June's issue of the JazzX Movie Vault with a nice juicy [C] attached.

---

Hey Jazz!

Do you happen to have Periers?

-Staree

---

Concerts I have witnessed lately:

1) Avenged Sevenfold
2) AC/DC
3) Metallica!

Hey Jazz, i abolutely love this thread! I happen to have about 150 films downloaded in my archives as well and seriously I admire you for the time you put into this thread to promote all these fantastic films. It's a joy to be remembert of all the wonderfull films and sometimes read about films you haven't seen before, to which you can look forward to watching, because you know if they made it into your list they certainly are well made. =)
Thanks for keep this thread up!

---

Staree_Films:

Hey Jazz!

Do you happen to have Periers?

-Staree

I do - a very war film which will also be mentioned in Junes edition.

You can still watch it here online.

Here's the link:

Periers 1944

---

TFD:

Hey Jazz, i abolutely love this thread! I happen to have about 150 films downloaded in my archives as well and seriously I admire you for the time you put into this thread to promote all these fantastic films. It's a joy to be remembert of all the wonderfull films and sometimes read about films you haven't seen before, to which you can look forward to watching, because you know if they made it into your list they certainly are well made. =)
Thanks for keep this thread up!

Thankyou very much, it's great fun going through each month's films to see which should be highlighted.

Many films are even better second time around.

Here's how a film gets here:

Each month, I'm likely to have reviewed several films  for each of my four review threads:

1) Recent releases
2) Random movies
3) Top Charted movies
&
4) The Open review thread (where people actually ask me to review their films)

All films scoring 4-stars or more get put in the JazzX Movie Vault, as do all series where at least one episode has scored 4 stars, and providing the entire series is available for me to watch.

If I think the films are enough, I put my own films in as well, and any others that I've acted in - though I reserve the right to be biased on these occasions!! (This is the only one of my threads where I allow myself to be biased about my own work, or other peoples' projects I've been involved in). So it's quite normal for me to present a film here that I've acted in, that I've never reviewed before (because I never officially review projects I'm involved in as a matter of course). Films like "Scramble", "Instinct", "For My Fellow Soldier" and "Interstellar Odyssey" - I may be wrong, but there would be few would disagree with me mentioning those films here.

One year after being added to the archive, the movies in the vault get featured in this thread - either mentioned as a mini review, or listed at the bottom.

Of all my review threads, this is the one where I relax my strict rules and have some fun - but the films that get mentioned fully deserve it despite the fact I never say anything negative about them in this thread. The aim is to show people the best things about the movies I've watched so that they might give them a chance too.

If you like, this is the thread where I become a gushing 5-star hobo for once with nothing bad to say!

Most of the time, only 5-star films get the mention - but occasionally, I'll watch a film that I gave 4-stars to before and decide that there's something unique or original about it that makes it worth mentioning.

Films that get the big [C] (classic status) are all winners of my top award The Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema.

Or films I believe would deserve that honour if I wasn't involved in that project or made that film myself (any film with me in it is not eligible for my highest award)! As I say, I reserve the right to be biased in this thread!

The only other films that get classic status are those that were added to the archive before the Prufrock's were invented. (eg. "King Kong" by Steven Kregg)


Right, three review threads down - one to go tonight. It's hard to tell how many films I've actually watched in the past 2 years+.

But in the last 48 hours, I've watched 24 films and 3 have qualified for the vault with 4-stars a-piece. I'd say that's reasonably typical. If 700 films have made it so far - then that would mean I've watched 5600 films!! Let's call it 5000 ...


Anyway, thanks for supporting this thread - it doesn't get that many replies, but it has had over 2000 views which I know means that people do take an interest.

---

Well folks, JazzX can't post at the moment as he's..."On Holiday", if you'd like - and he has personally requested that I post this for him while he is away getting smashed on Vodka in a bar in Vladisvostok and sampling the fine ten dollar ladies (Just kidding, Jazz - we all know you wouldn't be so desperate as to choose that...Whisky is much better ). And that, folks, is why I don't do comedy .

*edit* or formating. Sorry for the messed up format folks, hopefully it's still readable however, and I know not how to fix it! =O.

On with the show! The rest now comes from the fingers of JazzX himself, so listen up!

This month, it's April 2007 - yet another excellent month for films.
Hang on tight, here we go!:

April 2007 Highlights

[C] = classic must-watch film



http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/126089" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/126089">The Passage (episode
3) [C]

by josephkw

Genre: Military Sci-Fi

Duration: just over 16.5 minutes - released Friday March 30th 2007, 95
ratings, 4.99 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for battle scenes and some mild bad language


The classic sci-fi series continues, beginning with the outcome of a
tremendous space battle and then moving on to a sort of whodunnit which
ends in a real cliffhanger. Hopefully this isn't the last we'll see of
The Passage. The story just can't finish like that!





[url=http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/129366]An African
Tale (French with English subtitles)

by alutt

Genre: African Action Drama

Duration: 25.5 minutes - released Thursday 5th April 2007, 118 ratings,
4.96 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for some scenes of violence


What a treat this is! Africa comes to TMO - complete with Leopards,
Elephants and two fully modded African villages. A story which starts
out as a quest for a Leopard's egg (!) in order to save a tribe from
infertility soon becomes something else when ruthless white people
arrive by helicopter hoping to enslave another village in their new
diamond mine. A great story that holds one's attention for all 25
minutes. Even without a story, there's some breathtaking African scenery
on display. It's worth it just for that!




Janitor World Championship 2007 (No longer online)

by andy_inc

Genre: Sporting Event

Duration: 8 minutes - released Wednesday 11th April 2007, 21 ratings,
4.62 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for one mild expletive and scenes of injury


This, to my knowledge, is the only sports event film on TMO. We've had
the classy biopic "Mancini" and some tech demos showing golf and
basketball, maybe even some fight scenes thinly dressed as a sport, but
this is the only film which has actually tried to create a "live"
sporting event. A brand new sport at that.

The game involves two janitors, representing Australia (Home) and USA
(Away) - whose aim is to make the floor so wet that people fall over,
scoring them points - a form of human curling! Thanks to some superb
commentary ("bladdy idiot!") and halftime "analysis", the game is
genuinely exciting. It highlights how sports commentators can make even
the most boring game sound like life or death!

Really film, it's a one-of-a-kind. I await another sports film that
comes close to the drama and excitement of this one (yes, the match is a
cracker!) Only 21 people saw this, I thoroughly advise you to request
that I send you this one, as it's no longer online.






http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/62151" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/62151">Knights of the VIP
Table

by jentony

Genre: Wacky Comedy

Duration: nearly 5.5 minutes - released Sunday 5th March 2006, 6
ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for drugs references and one scene of a mildly
sexual nature


This comedy starts from the premise that, when Britain's military is
defeated by aliens, the last line of defence are the Royal Knights; guys
like Sir Elton John, Sir Mick Jagger and Sir Anthony Hopkins (names
slightly changed for legal reasons). What ensues is a hilarious comedy
which packs so many jokes into the 5 minutes that, despite no VO,
no freecam and only stock music, only 5-stars will do. This one was
discovered via the random movie button, hence the release date from over
2 years ago.




This Far and No Further (no longer online)

by Stutum

Genre: High School Drama

Duration: nearly 6.5 minutes - released Tuesday 17th April 2007, 4
ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for graphic scenes of violence and bad language


Meet mild-mannered Kurt Fizzywig - a lad relentlessly bullied at school;
they call him "sissywig" before beating the crap out of him while others
look on laughing, including "the opposites" - his description of the
opposite sex (shows how much luck he has in that department). But
there's only so much that one person can take before they're pushed over
the edge ...
An insight into what might drive someone to commit an attrocity like
Columbine - and a tale of what happens when you mistreat someone often
enough; they just might come back and mistreat you in a very final way.








http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/38438" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/38438">Best in the World

by BucFan20

Genre: Martial Arts

Duration: just over 14 minutes - released Friday 26th May 2006, 4
ratings, 4.75 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for violent scenes


When a janitor gets fired for fighting the school bully, he enters a
mysterious martial arts tournament to see who's the "Best in the World".
This "Enter the Dragon"-style movie has a well drawn hero, memorable
opponents and brilliant editing considering that this film was made
before Stunts and Effects and without any visual trickery. The big fight
near the end is suitably climactic - and the epilogue is a great
crowd-cheering moment with which to leave the theatre. Unlike most TMO
martial arts films, this story has characterisation and structure.
Highly recommended.






http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/128247" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/128247">For My Fellow Soldier -
Part 1 [C]

&

http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/128249" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/128249">For My Fellow Soldier -
Part 2 [C]

by rileyman

Genre: Action War Drama

Durations:
just over 17.5 minutes - released Saturday 24th March 2007, 49 ratings,
4.88 star average
&
nearly 14.5 minutes - released Saturday 24th March 2007, 36 ratings, 5
star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for intense battle scenes (both parts)


A classic World War II story based on real-life events. What sets this
apart from the usual TMO war film is its attention to the human costs of
war. It also shows the heroism and bravery of those who risked
everything for freedom. By carefully setting up the main character after
a nice battle scene at the front of the film, the story grabs you until
the end.

I was initially given the role of Sergeant Norfolk, but offered to help
when the lead actor disappeared. So I voiced Corporal Lance Holmes as
well. Both juicy roles which I relished for different reasons - Holmes
is a sensitive, middle class character (or that's how I chose to play
him), ideal for romantic scenes and putting a certain humanity into the
story. Norfolk is the brash working class Sergeant, nevertheless a
leader with an entertaining sarcastic wit (how close did I stray to
"marching up and down the square not enough for you eh?!" in my
ad-libs? ["Monty Python's Meaning of Life"]). The challenge was to make
them sound different, if I succeeded that was probably because both
characters never have a proper conversation with each other in the film!

The battle scenes are very well edited, I was pleased with the
sergeant's commands in these scenes - favourite line: "Get your bleeding
*** behind that rubble!"
The stock music is unapologetically (and superbly) used - indeed it is
showcased. The end credits proudly boast "Special Thanks to the City of
Prague Philharmonic Orchestra" which supplied much of the stock music
for The Movies.

So there it is; for my money the best war film on TMO. Also available in
glorious Hi-Res from my archive.





http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/131043" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/131043">Tainted Souls - Part II:
Hidden Truth

by jameseva

Genre: Supernatural Drama

Duration: 14 minutes - released Thursday 26th April 2007, 78 ratings, 5
star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


The saga continues as Ryan tries to have his father transferred from
Ravens Heights mental hospital. There's performances again and a
surprise at the end. Very mysterious - must-see entertainment.



http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/131012" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/131012">Shoelaces and Eggs

by rysto

Genre: Bizarre Comedy Creature Feature

Duration: just over 14.5 minutes - released Thursday 26th April 2007, 60
ratings, 4.88 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for scenes of horror


This is the story of how the Easter Bunny saved us all in 1907 and still
lives today. But He's not allowed to show himself to us as this would
break the conditions of the truce between humans and sparrows (or
something like that) and could lead to another shoelace war (!) - Just
don't ask, this is a fiercely entertaining film with superb mods and
overlays, tons of imagination and energy and the mother of all farmyard
battles at the end.



http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/130946" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/130946">Adventum Vita

by boefpo

Genre: Silent Arthouse

Duration: 5 minutes - released Wednesday 25th April 2007, 59 ratings,
4.81 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for scenes of violence



A man is knocked over by a van and enters another dimension.
This dialogueless film uses colour and smart editing to take the viewer
into an impressive dreamscape. Symbolic events occur that could be
considered linked to his struggle for survival in our world. Thoughtful
stuff, well worth 5 minutes of your time - beautiful cinematography.




http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/131013" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/131013">One Hit Wonder
(German with English subtitles) [C]

by GiorgioKiwi

Genre: Morality Comedy

Duration: 25.5 minutes - released Thursday 26th April 2007, 49 ratings,
4.94 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for occasional bad language


This really is a terrific film. It makes no pretensions to high art or
grand themes - it's just a very story told exceptionally well. I've
described it as a "Morality Comedy" - because it seems to be taking the
piss out of morality plays, but never in an overtly spoofy way; the
story stands up on its own. And there are a bundle of surprising
chuckles throughout the running time (not least the ending which
highlights the leniency of the German penal system! - that was an aside,
by the way, not a main point).

Meet George, a self-centred wannabe singer/songwriter struggling to make
ends meet. When his father dies, revealing that he has a half-brother in
a mental hospital in the process, it falls on George to either pay the
fees or take his half-brother home with him. He doesn't like it, but he
has no choice but to care for Tommy himself (a downs syndrome sufferer).

What follows are some funny scenes and then one of - no - THE best scene
involving music in the whole of TMO cinema (I said it at the time, and I
mean it one year later):

Tommy, to the annoyance of his half-brother, bashes away on his piano
enjoying himself (having got bored of switching the lights on and off
repeatedly for amusement!) - but gradually, his hidden talent comes
through - little-by-little a proper song is formed. It is truly one of
the outstanding musical moments on TMO which on first viewing, this
battle-hardened - and four-times banned - TMOer, will admit made him
weep. Not many TMO films do that. It must be heard to be believed. An
astonishing cinematic achievement.

Anyway - George (or "Geo") becomes famous largely on the back of his
half-brother - but unscrupulous people conspire to cause trouble for him
... some hilariously accuse him of exploiting disabled people for cash!
(I did say this was a morality comedy). And we're only halfway through
the story ....

It's a superb film, and thoroughly deserving of the 9th Prufrock
Award for Outstanding Cinema - any film I give that to is my
definition of a classic. Brilliant!

Here's a translation of the number 1 song in the movie (it's not shown
in the subtitles - so this was helpfully supplied by the filmmaker, but
I've paraphrased somewhat to make it more poetically suitable for the
English language):

I was young and rash when luck fell into my lap
I thought my life would be easy, happy and great
I met an old man, who warned me,
'cause he anticipated, what could happen to me

I laughed at the old man, and he started to say:
You seem to be in heaven, now you are admired by all
But just think, if you are there.
It's a long way to fall

I just laughed and said
'Just because your life was bleak and fortune bad to you,
Doesn't mean mine can't be filled with happiness'

But he just laughed at me and again started to say:
'You seem to be in heaven, now you are admired by all
But just think, if you're there,
It's a long way to fall'

http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/128811" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/128811">Interstellar Odyssey
(Part Two) [C]

by nukester

Genre: Exploratory Sci-fi Drama

Duration: 26 minutes - released Friday 30th March 2007, 173 ratings,
4.95 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


The story concludes with some shocking surprises. The most ambitious
sci-fi movie on TMO closes having completed its mission to explore new
worlds and discover new civilisations - to boldly go where no TMO sci-fi
has gone before.

Over 50 minutes of cinematic brilliance is over - I luckily won a hi-res
version of this, and other great films by nukester, in a lottery. And
I'm very glad. This is TMO cinema at its finest.

The icing on the cake: I got to say the first and last words of this
amazing epic. Thankyou! Thankyou! Thankyou!




http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/131148" target="_blank" title="http://movies.lionhead.com/movie/131148">Earth (French
with English subtitles)

by samyhouse

Genre: Apocalyptic Sci-fi

Duration: 19 minutes - released Saturday 28th April 2007, 103 ratings,
4.75 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for violent scenes



A superb invasion sci-fi film. It blends several parts of the same genre
together seamlessly and originally. A twist in this one too - the
less explanation, the better ...





Also archived this month:

"A Man Dream"
"Public Medication"
"The Shoelace Wars"
"Savage River"
"Gone Missing"
"Looks Can Be"
"Wally News TV - Issue 1"
"El Dorado - Part 1"
"Night by Night: A Hebrew Lullaby" (Music Video)
"Hunted 2: Return of a Hero"
"Ultimate TMOer: Final Entry"
"The Lady That Fell"
"The Lady That Fell 2"
"The Lady That Fell 3"
"A New Hero"



There are now 699 films in the archive - the latest addition being
"Sorrows of the Spy: Episode One" by OD-Ork-Boy


See you next month, with any luck ... don't forget that all these are
available for download from my archive. Just PM me, or leave your
request here in the thread.

---

Thanks for holding the fort in my abscence Orky!

The formatting was my fault - here's what it should look like:


****************************************************

This month, it's April 2007 - yet another excellent month for films. Hang on tight, here we go!:



April 2007 Highlights

[C] = classic must-watch film



The Passage (episode 3) [C]

by josephkw

Genre: Military Sci-Fi

Duration: just over 16.5 minutes - released Friday March 30th 2007, 95 ratings, 4.99 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for battle scenes and some mild bad language


The classic sci-fi series continues, beginning with the outcome of a tremendous space battle and then moving on to a sort of whodunnit which ends in a real cliffhanger. Hopefully this isn't the last we'll see of The Passage. The story just can't finish like that!





An African Tale (French with English subtitles)

by alutt

Genre: African Action Drama

Duration: 25.5 minutes - released Thursday 5th April 2007, 118 ratings, 4.96 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for some scenes of violence


What a treat this is! Africa comes to TMO - complete with Leopards, Elephants and two fully modded African villages. A story which starts out as a quest for a Leopard's egg (!) in order to save a tribe from infertility soon becomes something else when ruthless white people arrive by helicopter hoping to enslave another village in their new diamond mine. A great story that holds one's attention for all 25 minutes. Even without a story, there's some breathtaking African scenery on display. It's worth it just for that!




Janitor World Championship 2007 (No longer online)

by andy_inc

Genre: Sporting Event

Duration: 8 minutes - released Wednesday 11th April 2007, 21 ratings, 4.62 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for one mild expletive and scenes of injury


This, to my knowledge, is the only sports event film on TMO. We've had the classy biopic "Mancini" and some tech demos showing golf and basketball, maybe even some fight scenes thinly dressed as a sport, but this is the only film which has actually tried to create a "live" sporting event. A brand new sport at that.

The game involves two janitors, representing Australia (Home) and USA (Away) - whose aim is to make the floor so wet that people fall over, scoring them points - a form of human curling! Thanks to some superb commentary ("bladdy idiot!") and halftime "analysis", the game is genuinely exciting. It highlights how sports commentators can make even the most boring game sound like life or death!

Really film, it's a one-of-a-kind. I await another sports film that comes close to the drama and excitement of this one (yes, the match is a cracker!) Only 21 people saw this, I thoroughly advise you to request that I send you this one, as it's no longer online.

 




Knights of the VIP Table

by jentony

Genre: Wacky Comedy

Duration: nearly 5.5 minutes - released Sunday 5th March 2006, 6 ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for drugs references and one scene of a mildly sexual nature


This comedy starts from the premise that, when Britain's military is defeated by aliens, the last line of defence are the Royal Knights; guys like Sir Elton John, Sir Mick Jagger and Sir Anthony Hopkins (names slightly changed for legal reasons). What ensues is a hilarious comedy which packs so many jokes into the 5 minutes that, despite no VO, no freecam and only stock music, only 5-stars will do. This one was discovered via the random movie button, hence the release date from over 2 years ago.




This Far and No Further (no longer online)

by Stutum

Genre: High School Drama

Duration: nearly 6.5 minutes - released Tuesday 17th April 2007, 4 ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for graphic scenes of violence and bad language


Meet mild-mannered Kurt Fizzywig - a lad relentlessly bullied at school; they call him "sissywig" before beating the crap out of him while others look on laughing, including "the opposites" - his description of the opposite sex (shows how much luck he has in that department). But there's only so much that one person can take before they're pushed over the edge ...
An insight into what might drive someone to commit an attrocity like Columbine - and a tale of what happens when you mistreat someone often enough; they just might come back and mistreat you in a very final way.








Best in the World

by BucFan20

Genre: Martial Arts

Duration: just over 14 minutes - released Friday 26th May 2006, 4 ratings, 4.75 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for violent scenes


When a janitor gets fired for fighting the school bully, he enters a mysterious martial arts tournament to see who's the "Best in the World".
This "Enter the Dragon"-style movie has a well drawn hero, memorable opponents and brilliant editing considering that this film was made before Stunts and Effects and without any visual trickery. The big fight near the end is suitably climactic - and the epilogue is a great crowd-cheering moment with which to leave the theatre. Unlike most TMO martial arts films, this story has characterisation and structure. Highly recommended.






For My Fellow Soldier - Part 1 [C]

&

For My Fellow Soldier - Part 2 [C]

by rileyman

Genre: Action War Drama

Durations:
just over 17.5 minutes - released Saturday 24th March 2007, 49 ratings, 4.88 star average
&
nearly 14.5 minutes - released Saturday 24th March 2007, 36 ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for intense battle scenes (both parts)


A classic World War II story based on real-life events. What sets this apart from the usual TMO war film is its attention to the human costs of war. It also shows the heroism and bravery of those who risked everything for freedom. By carefully setting up the main character after a nice battle scene at the front of the film, the story grabs you until the end.

I was initially given the role of Sergeant Norfolk, but offered to help when the lead actor disappeared. So I voiced Corporal Lance Holmes as well. Both juicy roles which I relished for different reasons - Holmes is a sensitive, middle class character (or that's how I chose to play him), ideal for romantic scenes and putting a certain humanity into the story. Norfolk is the brash working class Sergeant, nevertheless a leader with an entertaining sarcastic wit (how close did I stray to "marching up and down the square not enough for you eh?!" in my ad-libs? ["Monty Python's Meaning of Life"]). The challenge was to make them sound different, if I succeeded that was probably because both characters never have a proper conversation with each other in the film!

The battle scenes are very well edited, I was pleased with the sergeant's commands in these scenes - favourite line: "Get your bleeding *** behind that rubble!"
The stock music is unapologetically (and superbly) used - indeed it is showcased. The end credits proudly boast "Special Thanks to the City of Prague Philharmonic Orchestra" which supplied much of the stock music for The Movies.

So there it is; for my money the best war film on TMO. Also available in glorious Hi-Res from my archive. 





Tainted Souls - Part II: Hidden Truth

by jameseva

Genre: Supernatural Drama

Duration: 14 minutes - released Thursday 26th April 2007, 78 ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


The saga continues as Ryan tries to have his father transferred from Ravens Heights mental hospital. There's performances again and a surprise at the end. Very mysterious - must-see entertainment.



Shoelaces and Eggs

by rysto

Genre: Bizarre Comedy Creature Feature

Duration: just over 14.5 minutes - released Thursday 26th April 2007, 60 ratings, 4.88 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for scenes of horror


This is the story of how the Easter Bunny saved us all in 1907 and still lives today. But He's not allowed to show himself to us as this would break the conditions of the truce between humans and sparrows (or something like that) and could lead to another shoelace war (!) - Just don't ask, this is a fiercely entertaining film with superb mods and overlays, tons of imagination and energy and the mother of all farmyard battles at the end.



Adventum Vita

by boefpo

Genre: Silent Arthouse

Duration: 5 minutes - released Wednesday 25th April 2007, 59 ratings, 4.81 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for scenes of violence



A man is knocked over by a van and enters another dimension.
This dialogueless film uses colour and smart editing to take the viewer into an impressive dreamscape. Symbolic events occur that could be considered linked to his struggle for survival in our world. Thoughtful stuff, well worth 5 minutes of your time - beautiful cinematography. 




One Hit Wonder (German with English subtitles) [C]

by GiorgioKiwi

Genre: Morality Comedy

Duration: 25.5 minutes - released Thursday 26th April 2007, 49 ratings, 4.94 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for occasional bad language


This really is a terrific film. It makes no pretensions to high art or grand themes - it's just a very story told exceptionally well. I've described it as a "Morality Comedy" - because it seems to be taking the piss out of morality plays, but never in an overtly spoofy way; the story stands up on its own. And there are a bundle of surprising chuckles throughout the running time (not least the ending which highlights the leniency of the German penal system! - that was an aside, by the way, not a main point).

Meet George, a self-centred wannabe singer/songwriter struggling to make ends meet. When his father dies, revealing that he has a half-brother in a mental hospital in the process, it falls on George to either pay the fees or take his half-brother home with him. He doesn't like it, but he has no choice but to care for Tommy himself (a downs syndrome sufferer).

What follows are some funny scenes and then one of - no - THE best scene involving music in the whole of TMO cinema (I said it at the time, and I mean it one year later):

Tommy, to the annoyance of his half-brother, bashes away on his piano enjoying himself (having got bored of switching the lights on and off repeatedly for amusement!) - but gradually, his hidden talent comes through - little-by-little a proper song is formed. It is truly one of the outstanding musical moments on TMO which on first viewing, this battle-hardened - and four-times banned - TMOer, will admit made him weep. Not many TMO films do that. It must be heard to be believed. An astonishing cinematic achievement.

Anyway - George (or "Geo") becomes famous largely on the back of his half-brother - but unscrupulous people conspire to cause trouble for him ... some hilariously accuse him of exploiting disabled people for cash! (I did say this was a morality comedy). And we're only halfway through the story ....

It's a superb film, and thoroughly deserving of the 9th Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema - any film I give that to is my definition of a classic. Brilliant!

Here's a translation of the number 1 song in the movie (it's not shown in the subtitles - so this was helpfully supplied by the filmmaker, but I've paraphrased somewhat to make it more poetically suitable for the English language):

I was young and rash when luck fell into my lap
I thought my life would be easy, happy and great
I met an old man, who warned me,
'cause he anticipated, what could happen to me
 
I laughed at the old man, and he started to say:
You seem to be in heaven, now you are admired by all
But just think, if you are there.
It's a long way to fall
 
I just laughed and said
'Just because your life was bleak and fortune bad to you,
Doesn't mean mine can't be filled with happiness'
 
But he just laughed at me and again started to say:
'You seem to be in heaven, now you are admired by all
But just think, if you're there,
It's a long way to fall'

Interstellar Odyssey (Part Two) [C]

by nukester

Genre: Exploratory Sci-fi Drama

Duration: 26 minutes - released Friday 30th March 2007, 173 ratings, 4.95 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


The story concludes with some shocking surprises. The most ambitious sci-fi movie on TMO closes having completed its mission to explore new worlds and discover new civilisations - to boldly go where no TMO sci-fi has gone before.

Over 50 minutes of cinematic brilliance is over - I luckily won a hi-res version of this, and other great films by nukester, in a lottery. And I'm very glad. This is TMO cinema at its finest.

The icing on the cake: I got to say the first and last words of this amazing epic. Thankyou! Thankyou! Thankyou!




Earth (French with English subtitles)

by samyhouse

Genre: Apocalyptic Sci-fi

Duration: 19 minutes - released Saturday 28th April 2007, 103 ratings, 4.75 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for violent scenes



A superb invasion sci-fi film. It blends several parts of the same genre together seamlessly and originally. A twist in this one too - the less explanation, the better ...





Also archived this month:

"A Man Dream"
"Public Medication"
"The Shoelace Wars"
"Savage River"
"Gone Missing"
"Looks Can Be"
"Wally News TV - Issue 1"
"El Dorado - Part 1"
"Night by Night: A Hebrew Lullaby" (Music Video)
"Hunted 2: Return of a Hero"
"Ultimate TMOer: Final Entry"
"The Lady That Fell"
"The Lady That Fell 2"
"The Lady That Fell 3"
"A New Hero"



There are now 699 films in the archive - the latest addition being "Sorrows of the Spy: Episode One" by OD-Ork-Boy


See you next month, with any luck ... don't forget that all these are available for download from my archive. Just PM me, or leave your request here in the thread.

***************************************************

My studio account is currently suspended - for no reason (all my films are still there anyway). That means I can't review.

There's a chance that it will never be un-suspended, in which case no new films will be added to the archive and this thread will close in 12 month's time when the films on my harddrive run out. Let's hope it doesn't come to that.

---

This month, it's May 2007 and, deary me, this is an astonishing month for TMO movies. It's going to be a long one (again). A month in which my highest award got wheeled out 3 times. Possibly the most fruitful month in TMO history. Read on, then watch these treasures:



May 2007 Highlights

[C] = classic must-watch film


Thong of the Dead [C]

by Marvellousguppimovies

Genre: Cult Comedy

Duration: 13.5 minutes - released Thursday May 3rd 2007, 164 ratings, 4.73 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for mild violence


This brilliant cult comedy is full of deft touches of imagination. One major villainous character is a flying tomato! (for example). Very funny lines throughout and flawless editing make this one of the best comedies of its type ever made on TMO. Winner of the 10th Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema.



The Hollow Dance - Part 1: In the Name of Love [C]

by mixmasterfestus

Genre: Heist Thriller

Duration: 8.5 minutes - released Saturday 5th May 2007, 149 ratings, 4.98 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for bad language and violence


When I first saw this, I thought someone had found a way to put outside edited films onto TMO - as this film represents a technical revolution in modding. The film is shot in black and white, but certain objects are in colour - it's beautiful to look at and very well acted by the two leads. There's also a back story (well - it's supposed to come to the fore in the next few chapters) about the futility of revenge - as yet, a year later, we eagerly await the next installment. If it's anything like this, we're in for such a treat!

In my review, I suggested that this exciting heist film had possibly broken these records:

"Best technical achievement in visual quality for an online quality TMO film
Best heist film on TMO
Best set design
Best editing
Best modded costumes and makeup
Best banter between two "buddy" characters
Best corporate logo scene/use of a cow in a TMO film
Best sound quality in a TMO film"

It's no surprise that I awarded this TMO heist classic the 11th Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema

A must-watch. No question.



Rite of the Amazon

by George_Locust

Genre: Tribal Action Drama

Duration: 10 minutes - released Thursday 17th May 2007, 63 ratings, 4.97 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for strong violence


A tale of boy meets girl, girl falls in love with boy, girl's amazon queen isn't happy and rips his heart out. Queen orders girl to be chased to the death by the rest of the tribe! So begins this spin-off from George Locust's "El Dorado"... (!)

Great editing and overlay work, a thrilling foot chase and a great ending which puts it all in perspective.



Un-Found War

by cut_scene

Genre: Political Arthouse

Duration: 6 minutes - released Wednesday 16th May 2007, 67 ratings, 4.82 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for realistic battle violence


This film is shot in a documentary style in black and white, using hand-held camera (shaky-cam; one of the first I saw using this technique). The battle scene is incredibly absorbing and realistic, even the cameraman ducks for cover at times! Great sound effects and a lack of music make the battle seem all too real. The film is intended to deliver a message and does so very well.



Into the Shadow - Part 3: Trust is a Nasty Thing  [C]

by sherwinliu

Genre: Noir Detective Thriller

Duration: nearly 18.5 minutes - released Saturday 26th May 2007, 98 ratings, 4.99 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for scenes of violence


The conclusion of the classic noir detective thriller - shot in black and white, the lighting is brilliant, as is the editing. The acting is terrific too - this series really is a classic of TMO noir cinema (which has become a genre in its own right).




The Source of my Power

by holdmykidney

Genre: Superhero Comedy

Duration: nearly 20.5 minutes - released Friday 11th May 2007, 74 ratings, 4.97 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for male nudity


The winner of the Roger Thong competition in 2007, it's easy to see why. Several gags pepper this comedy as we meet Lemmy, a prudish guy who feels too ashamed to walk into a lingerie shop with his girlfriend. But when Captain Supremo (played superbly by Kuroken) gets terminally injured saving the city from the Dr Mustard, an uncomfortable truth is revealed - Supremo is an ordinary man who gets all his power from the thong he wears, and now Lemmy must shake off all his hangups in order to wear the thong himself and fulfill his destiny as saviour of the city ...

... yes, it really is as entertaining as it sounds, there are some beautiful superhero shots during the movie and Dr Mustard cuts it as a very engaging villain (haha - that's not the only joke about his name). Great fun!




Periers 1944

by davidwww

Genre: Action War Drama

Duration: 25 minutes - released Sunday 1st April 2007, 91 ratings, 4.98 star average  

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for scenes of battle violence


A great WWII film - it's worth seeing just for the bomber shots; impressive when you consider that The Movies has no ready-made aeroplane shots. Superb overlay work, editing and sound effects throughout - you get rocked out of your seat by some of the explosions. One of the best TMO war films without question.




Pressure [C]

by qtigger

Genre: Psychological Drama

Duration: 13.5 minutes - released Monday 14th May 2007, 96 ratings, 4.96 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for scenes of violence


A superbly acted film - Rudy is a truly odious character whose answer to "isn't it wrong?" is "if you enjoy doing what you're doing it's not wrong" - and that's after beating up a tramp just for kicks (well, the meak and mild submissive friend in the relationship, Terry, who posed the question, was pressured into providing the final kick).

Every time I watch this, I get more upset at Terry - Rudy's wimpish friend. That means, every time the ending comes, I start leaning towards the idea that he may not have made the correct decision (which is left beautifully open). A must-watch psychological drama, it really is a classic of its genre on TMO. Winner of the 12th Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema



Shipwreck

by Scroop

Genre: Exploratory Science Fiction

Duration: 7 minutes - released Saturday 21st April 2007, 14 ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all



Based on a deceased sci-fi book, this excellent short film captures the loneliness of space in a way reminiscent of Forbidden Planet and 2001. There's a superb reasoning-with-the-computer scene and an understated tragicness about the situation - but this movie never once tries to tug the heart strings, and that's why it succeeds.



Also archived this month:

"The New Mobster"
"The Thunder"
"Life Sentence: No Remission"
"Ode to Di(e)"
"Panic Radio"
"Afternoon of the Dead"
"The Brotherhood" (Parts 1-3)
"Farmer Man & The Turnips of Justice" (Josephkw version)
"In the Shadow of a Witch"
"BlasterCard"
"Close Vengeance of the Ninja Kind"
"Duke Nukem Never Comes"
" Ninja Killers"
"The Remarkable Trio"
"Stakeout Squad: Bait"



There are now 717 films in the archive - the latest addition being "SCUM" by RavensFan_09



See you next month!

---

Wow! Added to the vault! I'm honored.

---

^ Check what Beck's up to now.

TMUnderground

RavensFan09:

Wow! Added to the vault! I'm honored.

So you should be - not every film gets in the vault!

---

There'll be two editions this month thanks to the excitement we've had in the last few weeks. But July 2007 is not too bad, so let's go ...


... to June 2007, no shortage of films to watch from this month - I'm sure you'll agree!




June 2007 Highlights

[C] = classic must-watch film



The God Illusion - Root of all Ills? Part 1: Unintelligent Design [C]

by JazzX

Genre: Polemic Documentary Comedy

Duration: 13 minutes - released Saturday 2nd June 2007, 61 ratings, 4.36 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for animal violence, mild insults and religiously sensitive material


This, to my knowledge, is TMO's first ever proper attempt at a TV documentary. My goal in making it was to have some fun with documentary cliches and to try out my Richard Dawkins impersonation, having recently seen his "Root of all ?" Channel 4 programme. I also got to make the music as well - no documentary would be complete without some cheesy synthesiser going on subtly telling the audience what they should agree with and what they should be disgusted by!

My creation, Professor Richard Lawkins, was designed to be even more passionate about his work, and more outspokenly anti-religious than Dawkins is. Set in an environment of TMO "animals", the hope was that people on both sides would see this as a funny film.

... how wrong I turned out to be. The film provoked many lengthy reviews for a TMO film, most of which completely ignored my attempts at humour and focused straight up on the atheism v religion debate. Surprisingly, there were relatively few religious people who were offended by the film. Most of the criticism against it was from atheists and agnostics who thought I was either oversimplifying the argument or being cruel to religious people by questioning their beliefs, giving atheism a bad name in the process (the real Dawkins comes in for more of exactly the same). Only recently have I been labelled as "Satan" by one person for making this movie.

Many people left reviews detailing their own personal experiences (from both sides) or fleshed out their own personal beliefs which made for some interesting, and much appreciated, reading.

For the technical aspects of the film, I tried out a number of things - but the style of the show follows these rules:

* High quality VO close to the mic, with music when Lawkins is not speaking from in the field
* Low quality VO away from the mic, with only ambient sound effects when Lawkins is shown in the field

That way, the viewer could easily distinguish between when Lawkins is actually talking from within a place, or just in the studio narrating.


I stumbled across a superb way of making vast landscapes even more impressive. Use the greenscreen and pan the camera, you get an amazing 3D effect. The Grand Canyon looked spectacular, especially in the Super Hires version.


Anatomy of a Scene: "Falwell's Office"

The cameraman was treated as a person - I made sure that there were no objects in the way. My favourite moment for him was when I squeezed him through the door of Jerry Falwell's office just before Lawkins slams it! Then he followed the conversation, trying to keep up with the to-and-fro, and having an artistic mind of his own (focussing on the Bible on Falwell's desk as a punctuation mark).

Incidentally, that scene was very stage directed - I had to edit the animations together in a seemless way so that the positions of the characters followed logically. Here's how it goes:

Lawkins meets Falwell in the middle of the room, as he explains his first question to Falwell, the camera focusses only on him. Meanwhile, Falwell runs around behind his desk (not seen).

The camera swings around to Falwell who points triumphantly to the Bible on his desk as his answer. Meanwhile, Lawkins has sat down on the chair in front of the desk (not seen). The camera pans away from the Bible up to, the now sat down, Lawkins.
Similarly, towards the end of the conversation - Lawkins stands up mid-sentence as he begins to get wound up by what he sees as Falwell's evasive answers. Then he marches towards Falwell ready for the big head-to-head behind the desk, which is where the climax of the film takes place. It needs to happen there because the best animations for in-yer-face arguing are at that location. So I had to manouever the characters logically so that they ended up behind the desk for the showdown.

*************

I was also thrilled to discover the "two walk" scene (I think that's what it's called). I got some terrific shots of Lawkins explaining himself to the camera while walking, by replacing the second character with the cameraman. I think it works great, such a documentary cliche, I was able to easily make the gestures fit the dialogue.

For music, I recorded the VO for each narrated section - and then improvised while recording during playback. That way, the mood of the music matched exactly the points Lawkins was making. eg. [Light airy chords] "Science marches forward, striving to find the answers, but ..." [dark, foreboding, bare low notes] "there are a large number of people for whom science is not enough, or not an issue at all ..."

Acting - well, I studied Dawkins extensively prior to making this. Eventually, I shied away from an outright impersonation, but I use a lot of his verbal mannerisms and tone of voice - I made sure that Lawkins sounded similarly "educated".
AnotherNewDawn gives a great performance as the late Jerry Falwell (he died just before this film was completed ... Jerry Falwell, I mean [haha!]).


Other highlights:

Lawkins using his horsey, Pruffles, to counter the claim of improbability for evolution; George Bush's likeness to other species of similarly evolved apes; Lawkins' face as he enters the creationist Liberty University! To name only three.


So - I think I made a film here, the first of its kind on TMO. I am currently working on Part 2, "The Morality of Faith" - easily the most difficult of the four episodes. So far, I've written the first three scenes and modded a Glasgow Rangers football shirt... I also know that Bach's Toccata and Fugue will set the scene for Rangers v Celtic ("Rollerball" used the same music to set the scene for its own bloodbath masquerading as a sport!)

It's taking a while because I want it to be as as this one.








The Turkey Run: Stage Coach

by MokEwok

Genre: Action Western

Duration: nearly 9 minutes - released Saturday 26th May 2007, 3 ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for two instances of bad language, and action violence


This Western is great fun. The anti-heroine, Wendy, kicks things off by staging a daring solo bank robbery. Soon, two crooks decide to team up with her. Lots of fun one-liners and action scenes.





Clive's Golf Day (no longer online)

by Kwistufa

Genre: Comedy

Duration: just over 1.5 minutes - released Thursday 7th June 2007, 141 ratings, 4.48 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


This very slight comedy is notable for its incredible realisation of the game of golf - a first, and so far unrepeated, feat for a TMO film.

 




Lex LOVE

by epana

Genre: Soppy Romance

Duration: 10.5 minutes - released Sunday 18th March 2007, 29 ratings, 4.97 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


There aren't too many soppy romances on TMO - especially not made as well as this one. Apart from the fact it has great overlays and sets (very romantic - sunsets in the park etc.), it also has a punchline. Unashamedly soppy, it remains the best film of its type on TMO.





the Nature of Things
(no longer on TMO - for best viewing, request this higher resolution version from the vault and watch in full screen)

by josephkw

Genre: Spoof Documentary/Social Commentary

Duration: nearly 7.5 minutes - released Saturday 16th June 2007, 83 ratings, 4.98 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - small children may find some scenes disturbing



This comedy treat is two documentaries in one - witness the callous Mel Ein as he shows you how to study animals; he believes in 'only' tranquilising Orangutangs (or "Orange Tangs" as he insists on calling them) instead of killing them because "we need to study them in their natural condition". David Attenborough he is not! But ... there may be even worse documentary filmmakers than him around ...

Very funny, and yet with more than enough bite under the surface as it quietly ladles on the scorn against human arrogance.






Kayna

by Rik_Vargard

Genre: Bizarre Fantasy Adventure

Duration: 13 minutes - released Monday 28th May 2007, 369 ratings, 4.78 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for violent scenes


This film almost begins like TMO's first ever musical. A piano playing alien takes centre stage for the first two scenes - narrating in song - followed by an ensemble dance sequence. But after this bizarre, yet entertaining, opening - the film settles down into a meandering road movie with colourful sets, backdrops, costumes and characters. The film is like a medieval Star Wars in the way it is set up. Well worth watching - you won't see anything else like it!







Got Game

by rysto

Genre: Comedy Character Study

Duration: just over 5.5 minutes - released Wednesday 13th June 2007, 56 ratings, 4.84 star average  

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all



This film takes you into the mind of an obsessed MMRPG gamer. He wears a full sci-fi costume just to sit down and play the game! (well, I wear a tuxedo every time I watch a TMO movie for the first time, so it can't be that different) - then, on the way to buy the expansion pack for his favourite game, he fantasises about the things he's seen in videogames. So, for example, when the soda machine doesn't deliver the s, he fantasises about blowing it to pieces with a shotgun. There's loads of great moments like that in this funny film - nice mods and overlays and a sweet ending too. You should get game.







The Sleeping City (VO Edition)

by castigo

Genre: Arthouse Fable

Duration: 9 minutes - released Saturday 16th June 2007, 28 ratings, 4.86 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all



Meet Robert, your average office worker, one day he finds that the city is completely empty - is he dreaming, or is the city dreaming of him? (I did say this was arthouse!) A dreamlike quality infuses the whole of this imaginative film.






Scratch (aka. $cratch) [C]

by George_Locust

Genre: Crime Thriller

Duration: 23 minutes - released Wednesday 13th June 2007, 112 ratings, 4.92 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for graphic violence and bad language


Forget the engaging monologue at the beginning, or the entertaining banter between the two leads ...
For my money, this film has TMO's best ever shootout. Superbly edited and with terrific use of overlays to capture each, sometimes fleeting, action moment. The quality of the ending is something that could quite easily be compared to the likes of Pulp Fiction or True Romance. The dark side of the American Dream is done real justice by this movie, and the 13th Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema is rightfully its reward. An outstanding piece of filmmaking.



Alien Swingers in Space

by unktob

Genre: Adolescent Science Fiction Sex Comedy

Duration: nearly 4 minutes - released Thursday 30th March 2006, 6 ratings, 4.67 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for adult themes


Great gags in this puerile sex comedy - an alien space captain selects only hot babes (including one alien) for his crew. After seeing them all seperately and being found out, he laments "time to face the wrath of 3 women" .. "this is going to suck ..." .. "but damn! It sure was worth it!"
That's the beginning of the film. The title suggests how they resolve their differences. laughs a-plenty to be had here.




Aya and Yumi 5: Songs of Vengeance

by madone69

Genre: Buddy Action Thriller

Duration: 17 minutes - released Friday 15th June 2007, 33 ratings, 4.79 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for violent scenes and mild sexuality


A great film here as two inseperable girls try to outwit a murderer wanting revenge. There's loads of lines in this film and the bond of friendship (maybe more - that's left open ended) between the pair is some of the best writing for two friends I've seen in any TMO film. The policewoman reminds me of TMO moderators, full of moralising but turns a blind eye to the crimes of her friends (in one hilarious early scene, the cop asks for one of the girls' driving licences just so she can remark on the change in their weight since the photo was taken - she then lets them off speeding). This is all fun - but it's the relationship between the two leads that make this film. Just great writing.




Empire (Part One)

Empire (Part Two)

& Empire (Part Three)

Genre: Fantasy Epic

Durations:
16.5 minutes - released Saturday 24th February 2007, 104 ratings, 4.82 star average
22.5 minutes - released Saturday 28th April 2007, 62 ratings, 4.92 star average
26 minutes - released Tuesday 26th June 2007, 50 ratings, 4.96 star average

BBFC rating: (15) overall - for graphic violence


There have been several films described as "epic" on TMO. But this series truly deserves the title - so far, there are another two episodes to add to those on show here.
Everything you would want from a fantasy epic is present: great battles, rousing speeches, kings, knights, villains and doomed heroes. My favourite episode is number 3 with its stirring battle scene - the "Helm's Deep" of TMO. The sheer ambition on display is something to behold and easily papers over any technical issues. There's lots of imagination too, primarily in the way overlays are used to make each scene work. This fantasy epic is well worth the effort - no doubt about it. Watch them all back-to-back like I've just done and you get a near-complete sense of the epicness of the story!




The Road Less Traveled

by rysto

Genre: Moral Fable

Duration: nearly 5.5 minutes - released Wednesday 20th June 2007, 73 ratings, 4.82 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for some mildly disturbing material


In this interesting film, we see an event three times. Each time, the main character makes a different decision and we immediately see the long term consequences of his choice. The film raises a number of questions that go beyond the material shown, and that makes it well worth seeing.




Light and Darkness

by mocemanix

Genre: Arthouse Fantasy

Duration: just over 6.5 minutes - released Monday 25th June 2007, 72 ratings, 4.83 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for some mildly disturbing material


This film documents Man's destruction according to Amantis, a deity - the film's message is wide open to interpretation due to the poetic way the lines and visuals are delivered. All sorts of religious and philosophical questions are brought up by this movie. I won't diminish it by saying it's a "stoner", there's more depth to it than that, but that demographic will not be disappointed by this film!




He Truly Is

by Zuckerman

Genre: Bizarre Fantasy

Duration: 6 minutes - released Monday 25th June 2007, 47 ratings, 4.87 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all



I'm going to chicken out of giving any description for this - except to say that this almost indescribable film is a real coop for the filmmaker.




Also archived this month:

"What Lies West of the Mississippi"
"The Stagecoach: Turkey Run II"
"REAP" (parts 1-4)
"The Brothers Petrov"
"The Most Unlikely of Places"
"Crossed"
"The Sexiest Movie Ever"
"Our President"
"Lionhead - A Fairy Tale"
"The Dating Dilemma"
"How a Vampire Changed the World"




There are now 749 films in the archive - the latest addition being the improved resolution version of "the Nature of Things" by josephkw.


Don't forget that all films mentioned in this thread are available upon request - those hi-res films only hosted on TMU are worth requesting too if you don't have Firefox and Media Player Classic. That way, you can download and watch them at the correct frame rate in full screen (the only way cinema should be watched!)


See you in a fortnight!

---

Wow - I'm ahead of time for once,

The second edition this month as we play catchup after the TMO crash. Not many films were reviewed in July 2007, but those that were scored highly:


July 2007 Highlights


Dead Last

Dead Last 2

&

Dead Last 3

by noose2loose

Genre: Zombie Apocalypse

Durations:
3 minutes - released Wednesday 20th September 2006, 7 ratings, 4.71 star average
5 minutes - released Thursday 21st September 2006, 4 ratings, 4.75 star average
just over 7.5 minutes - released Friday 22nd September 2006, 4 ratings, 5 star average

BBFC ratings:
Part 1: /PG\ - for action violence and mild gore
Parts 2 & 3: (15) - for bad language

So we begin with the opening three chapters of this obscure low-budget Zombie saga. The characters are well drawn with some lines for the hero to say as he successfully shows us a desolate world where most people have ended up in the ranks of the undead. Plenty of zombie action is the order of the day as the survivors band together to try to defeat the monstrous menace. Nice twist in part 3. This series was continued this year after over 18 months without an episode. A hearty welcome back to this filmmaker!



USN Jupiter - Episode 1: "The Attack"

by Spaceman72

Genre: Military Science Fiction

Duration: 13 minutes - released Sunday 22nd July 2007, 116 ratings, 4.93 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for battle scenes


If you like Enigma, Conquest, Interstellar Odyssey or The Passage, you'll like this (most of the cast is the same as in those films - lol) - it has very high production values with superb in-cockpit special effects in the battle scenes and a polished feel to the acting. It's about the crew of a military spacecraft called into action when Earth is put under a surprise attack by aliens. It has a new Battlestar Galactica feel to it, which just goes to show how it is.



A Darker Thriller (French with English subtitles)

by samyhouse

Genre: Supernatural Crime Thriller

Duration: 12.5 minutes - released Sunday 24th June 2007, 123 ratings, 4.91 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for violent scenes

I'm still not quite sure of what's going on in this story, but it's visually breathtaking with some of the finest camerawork you'll see on any TMO film. Very special effects when required as well as an excellent last scene with an amazing twist. Another classy film from this French filmmaker.



Gloop Gloop

by rysto

Genre: Puerile Science Fiction Comedy

Duration: just over 2.5 minutes - released Monday 2nd July 2007, 32 ratings, 4.72 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for puerile comedy

I'm saying nothing about this film, except that it's funny - I'm so ashamed of laughing at it!



Who Wants to be a VCillionaire? - Episode 3

by eobaggs

Genre: Quiz Show

Duration: 17 minutes - released Tuesday 29th May 2007, 71 ratings, 4.9 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


TMO's best attempt at a quiz show gets it right in this 3rd episode of the series. Some of the contestants are quite funny, the questions have been toughened up and the format improved, making the game much closer to the legendary "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" which it is based on. You get to learn all sorts of useless trivia about TMO in 2007 along the way, making this show as much a historical document as a mere quiz.



Also archived this month:

"Love is an Enigma (Music Video)"
"Pimp Saga 2: Still Pimpin'"
"Old Folk Funk Train" (Music Video)
"Space"



There are now 760 films in the vault, the latest addition being "Doctor Who - Episode 10: End of the Road" by DoctorWhoattheMovies

All films in the archive are available for download on request.


See you next month for more fabulous films - this time August 2007

---

As we continue to venture on our voyage of discovery, we reach August 2007, check these out:


August 2007 Highlights


Assassination Incorporated (no longer online)

Assassination Incorporated 2 (no longer online)

&

Assassination Incorporated 3 (no longer online)

by simpsdog

Genre: Action Spy/Hitman


Durations:

nearly 6.5 minutes - released Monday 11th June 2007, 29 ratings, 4.77 star average,

just over 10 minutes - released Friday 15th June 2007, 34 ratings, 4.91 star average,

& 11 minutes - released Tuesday 10th July 2007, 65 ratings, 4.75 star average


BBFC rating: (12) - for intense action violence


Imagine James Bond, but with a permanent female sidekick. This spy series of three self-contained adventures has action a-plenty. There's also some very lines and superb editing. When the VO finally arrives in part 3, I think you'll be surprised by the sexy Sinclair! Sinclair also has the best story in part 2. This is a really spy series for its story telling skills alone.




Who Wants to be a Vcillionaire? - Episode 4

by eobaggs

Genre: TV Quiz Show

Duration: 12.5 minutes - released Friday 27th July 2007, 48 ratings, 4.54 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


Last month, I highlighted episode 3 of this gameshow. Here in episode 4, the production is even slicker and with a dryly entertaining contestant too. This was the last one, and the best to boot. If gameshows aren't your thing, then watch this particular episode just for the craftsmanship involved.




Blood Berries

by rysto

Genre: Supernatural Action Horror

Duration: 8 minutes - released Monday 13th August 2007, 23 ratings, 5 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for scary scenes


This film, shot tastefully in black and white (and high resolution), reminds me of the Indiana Jones films, as the hero goes exploring the tomb. It's got some jumpy moments, but above all it's extremely well produced.




Get On Up (The Anthem) (Music Video)

by First_Demand_Productions

Genre: Hip-hop Music Video

Duration: 3 minutes - released Friday 30th March 2007, 136 ratings, 4.91 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for mild violence


Well - this one's in the archive but I didn't review it for some reason. So, last night I put that right!

Here's my official review of Get On Up (The Anthem):

***** stars

"MC Jazz in the house tellin' ya where its at,
These rhymes go bustin' crimes and the beat is phat.

A message to the haters and the ninja crew,
They can suck my **** with their * star reviews

So screw you with your stupid little games,
This film is BAD y'all, his name is Marcus Crane

The bestest hip-hop ever seen on TMO
And with the viz and style to match, it surely shows.

A predator with the editor, he masters every scene
No complicization with the synchronization, it's enough to make you cream

So **** the haters, **** the movie police,
This film ain't ****,

It's ***** - I said my piece.

I'm out ..."

Also archived this month:

"Journey to Flipsville - Chapter One"
"Why The Movies Needs Firefighters"
"The Vermin on the Mount"
"SINS"
"Call of Madness"
"Giulia"
"The Last Supper - Starring Jesus Christ"
"Dog Pound"





There are now 769 films in the vault, the latest addition being "Final Night" by BiggsTrek. All are available on request.

See you next month!

---

Back to September 2007 this month. Time flies doesn't it? It's all a blur! Speaking of which ...:


September 2007 Highlights


Privates in the Blur: Prologue (French with English subtitles) (no longer online)

Privates in the Blur - Episode 1: La Naissance du Boucher (Part 1) (aka. Privates in the Blur - Episode 1: Birth of the Butcher (Part 1)) (French with English subtitles) (No longer online)

Privates in the Blur - EPisode 1: La Naissance du Boucher (Part 2) (aka. Privates in the Blur - Episode 1: Birth of the Butcher (Part 2)) (French with English subtitles) (No longer online)

Privates in the Blur - Episode 2: Mortelle Destinee (aka. Privates in the Blur - Episode 2: Mortal Destiny) (French with English subtitles) (No longer online)

Privates in the Blur - Episode 3: En Quete De Redemption (Part 1) (aka. Privates in the Blur - Episode 3: In Search of Redemption (Part 1)) (French with English subtitles)

&

Privates in the Blur - Episode 3: En Quete De Redemption (Part 2) (aka. Privates in the Blur - Episode 3: In Search of Redemption (Part 2)) (French with English subtitles)

by Kowaru (prologue), Lukavey (episode 1, parts 1 & 2), samyhouse (episode 2), melicendre (episode 3, parts 1 & 2)

Genre: Epic Slasher Crime Thriller


Durations:

(Prologue) 5 minutes - released Monday 11th June 2007, 71 ratings, 4.89 star average,
(Episode 1 - Part 1) just over 18.5 minutes - released Wednesday 12th September 2007, 54 ratings, 4.93 star average
(Episode 1 - Part 2) 19 minutes - released Friday 14th September 2007, 37 ratings, 4.95 star average
(Episode 2) 21.5 minutes - released Wednesday 19th September 2007, 48 ratings, 4.98 star average
(Episode 3 - Part 1) 16.5 minutes - released Sunday 23rd September 2007, 36 ratings, 5 star average
(Episode 3 - Part 2) 12 minutes - released Wednesday 26th September 2007, 30 ratings, 4.97 star average
 

BBFC ratings:
Prologue: (12) - for mild gore and violence
Episode 1, Part 1: (12) - for disturbing and violent scenes
Episode 1, Part 2: [18] - for gruesome scenes
Episode 2: [18] - for gruesome scenes and female nudity
Episode 3, Part 1: (15) - for bad language
Episode 3, Part 2: (15) - for disturbing scenes


This is a real treat! Working off the same screenplay (by Demarreur and Riggs), four of France's best TM directors bring us this cat & mouse epic about a slasher and the detectives in pursuit. It's gripping stuff, very well acted and with brilliant editing and camerawork.

Highlights for me are the engrossing finale of Episode 2 and a truly memorable scene in the park in Episode 3, which I won't spoil by saying any more.

Thinking caps on though! This one requires you to keep a track of a complicated story, but the characters and the way they are fleshed out make it more than worth the effort.

90+ minutes of classy French cinema - and you're only just halfway there! There are another 2 episodes, an epilogue and another director in the series (I've not seen the other episodes yet).

It's interesting comparing the different styles of each director.



Wolves

by Lethal_Entertainment

Genre: Psychological Horror

Duration: 6.5 minutes - released Tuesday 24th July 2007, 74 ratings, 4.88 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for some disturbing material


Excellent acting in what is largely a monologue. The atmosphere created is disturbing and the ending is a 'un. Well worth checking out.



Bimbos On Fire Will Be Right Back

by thebiz

Genre: Satirical Spoof TV Advertisement

Duration: 2.5 minutes - released Friday 24th August 2007, 39 ratings, 4.64 star average

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all


This very well made "advert" uses humour to send its message about the damage we're doing to our environment. Most people would rather dull their minds with rubbish like Big Brother or Bimbos on Fire than pay attention to something that's actually important. That seems to be the view expressed here - we get actual disgusting shots of "The Venice of Brooklyn" at the end of the film, sealing a powerful and timely message very well delivered.

Add to that some impressive mod and overlay work (the glass bottomed gondola is excellent [honestly, watch it - you couldn't invent it!]) and you have a classy and original piece of work.

At 2 and a half minutes, there's no excuse not to watch it right now!



Also archived this month:

"The Other Door - Part 1"
"Temporary Night: Vengeance Rising" (Music Video)
"Law of the West (Part A)"
"Law of the West (Part B)"
"Schroder"


There are now 786 films in the vault, the latest additions being "Sorrows of the Spy: Episode 2" Parts 1 & 2 by Od-Ork-Boy.

As usual, all the films in my archive are available on request.

See you next month if not before!

---

I'm back!

Yes - two months have gone by.

By sheer coincidence, October 2007 was the only month where I didn't archive any films - and November 2008 was when news of the end of TMO came through. So I chose not to have an edition of the movie vault last month and concentrate on saving more films for the archive before they all disappeared.

But, my ness, I made up for lost time!

Yes, this month there are a wealth of featured films, many of which are classics. In fact, I don't think there was a single month which had so many great films in it than November 2007 - surely the best month for extremely high quality TMO films (and not just because I'm in a large proportion of them! [haha])

Any film marked with a [C] is a must-watch classic and represents the best of what TMO had to offer according to yours truly.

But that's not all! I've started a channel on TMU where you can easily watch the featured films below - even those marked as "no longer online". Be aware that all films will be removed next month to make way for new movies from the vault (probably mid-late January).

Here's the link:

The JazzX Movie Vault Channel

Enjoy!


November 2007 Highlights

Cleopatra (Part II) (not online, now available edited together with Part I as Cleopatra)

by TheMGMKid

Genre: Historical Epic

Duration: Part II only: 25 minutes - combined Part I and Part II: 43.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (12) - for violent scenes (both parts)

The epic saga continues with sumptuous locations, romance, skullduggery and a climactic ending - and we're only half way through!



Wacky You Want

by Rysto

Genre: Wacky Easter Creature Comedy

Duration: 4 minutes

BBFC rating: (12) - for bad language

Completely crazy, but some great gags as we see multitudes of Easter bunnies going head to head and toe to toe with Easter chicks. Who wins? Well there's a nice twist at the end.  



Operation Black Widow (no longer online)

by simpsdog

Genre: Secret Agent Action Thriller

Duration: 10 minutes

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for some mild violence

This is what America has in store if it doesn't promote one of its female officers to General any time soon:

They might quit the army, go to Mexico and start their own army composed entirely of women, before acquiring some nerve gas and attempting to use it on their erstwhile military superiors in the US just to teach them a lesson! ("we'll show them who the weaker sex REALLY is!")

Luckily, should they even think of doing that, America's best female CIA operative will be sent in to single-handedly sort them out!

That looks corny - and it is - but this movie has blockbuster music, some great VOs from the mainly female cast and nice one-liners. Very entertaining!



Wiwanyank Wacipi - La Danse du Soleil: Part 2 (aka. "Wiwanyank Wacipi - The Sundance: Part 2") (French with English subtitles) [C]

by Cinecitta

Genre: Street Crime Drama

Duration: just over 18.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (15) - for violence, bad language and drug use

The saga continues with Elliot hitting rock bottom on the streets; a world of pimps, prostitutes, drugs, begging and hopelessness ... not to mention the cops. Masterfully created - I waited until the next episode before giving this series my highest award. Atmospheric and engaging, this series is definitely a must-watch. Check out the way the camera and lighting are used in the drugs trip sequence!



May Flowers [C] (Hi-res version available)

by josephkw

Genre: Supernatural Gothic Romance

Duration: 21.5 minutes

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for one scary scene and drunken behaviour

This brilliantly written and played film made the director the first person ever to win my highest award twice. Such an original story told in a languid style which kind of washes over you like the passing of the seasons themselves. It starts off as a very sweet and engaging romance story as Henry takes a fancy to a girl called May that he meets on the street, but beyond that I'm not spoiling anything! You can take it from me that it's unusual and very worthwhile though.

This is film-making at its finest - so that it won first place in the H.P. Lovecraft Film Festival 2007. When you see it (not if), you'll easily see why.



The Dead Cases - Part 1 (Hi-res version available) [C]

&

The Dead Cases - Part 2 (Hi-res version available) [C]

by Jase180

Genre: Supernatural Detective Noir

Duration: 21.5 minutes & just over 22.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (15) - for bad language and scenes of gore (both parts)

Here's a superb noir film with a difference. It's about John Noble, a man who ends up in prison wrongly convicted of manslaughter. In a skillful piece of story telling, we find out halfway through why he never even attempted to defend himself in court. You see (well not really unless you watch the film!), John has a special power that allows him to bring the dead back to life for questioning! [British TV sci-fi fans will recognise a similar concept from Torchwood: the resurrection glove!]

Superb acting by the lead and an immersive atmosphere are the main features of this film. My own contribution to the movie was to supply the trumpet theme (which I'm very pleased with) and to act as one of the main characters. Book was the toughest character I've ever played, requiring a lot of redos - my voice isn't normally that low and a sore throat was inevitable! But there's no doubt this was a project I was very proud to be a part of. The effort was worth every packet of Strepsils it cost to make! Watch it!



Athena Project: The Series - Episode I: The Portal (no longer online)

&

Athena Project: The Series - Episode II: "Best Laid Plans" (no longer online)

by Fulkster

Genre: TV Science Fiction

Duration: just over 8 minutes & nearly 12 minutes

BBFC rating:
Episode I: U - suitable for all
Episode II: /PG\ - for some violence


This is an extremely well presented sci-fi TV series. I'm a sucker for time travel stories - so when it turns into one in part 2, I was on tenterhooks! The spaceship is forced to land on earth in the 1800s for repairs to the damaged warp drive. But a previous time traveller was already raising their teenage daughter in that era to be ready for the arrival of future invaders, in particular robots, by teaching her how to shoot with deadly accuracy! I just fell in love with this concept. I also like how each episode begins with a great quote. In part 2, this is supplied by Isaac Asimov and his "Rules of Robotics". They basically say "Don't harm humans", "Obey humans unless ordered to harm them" and "Protect yourself at all times unless that conflicts with not harming humans". Needless to say, the robot in part 2 breaks these rules! I would most certainly have liked to see more of this series if it exists. Check it out. 



Real Estate Agent Smith (no longer online)

by Bongoman

Genre: Military Science Fiction Satire

Duration: 5.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (15) - for bad language


This film is supposed to be an anti-war movie, but in its entertaining recurring episodic structure you get to see some cool animations of humans and aliens duking it out with a ton of hardware. This was one of the first films to use in-game footage from a non-The Movies game, with the video capture exported as hundreds of overlays for the battle sequences. Very impressive to watch.



Gamma Force: Operation Liberty - Part I (no longer online)

&

Gamma Force: Operation Liberty - Part II (no longer online)

by Cruise1970

Genre: Action Thriller

Duration: nearly 9 minutes and nearly 6.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (12) - for violent scenes (both parts)

In this action film, I got to play the part of Shawn Grease aka. Snake Eye! The story is about an elite team of three civilians drafted into the military to take on a German drugs/terrorist group in Katrina-hit New Orleans. In "Enter the Dragon" style, each member of the team is introduced in flashback - my character is shown doing his day job of sniping for a SWAT team in New York, then we see an American bare-knuckle boxer in action (this is a cool sports scene right down to the instant crowd reactions according to who's winning). The film has some really visual effects and sound design in its running time. Some acting as well, the drill instructor is superb! It's worth watching just for that!


SKETCHES!

by RavensFan_09

Genre: Wacky Comedy Sketch Show

Duration: nearly 6.5 minutes

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all

Some laughs to be had in this comedy sketch show. I'll not give away the jokes here, but the weatherman and the basketball coach are my favourites!



Phantoms

by OD-Ork-Boy

Genre: Military Science Fiction

Duration: just over 25 minutes

BBFC rating: (15) - for bad language

An elite team of commandos is sent in to a base on a far off planet to recover some secret documents. Getting in seems to be too easy - could it be a trap?

There's great banter and one liners from the soldiers in this film and a lot of attention to detail in the operational procedure (such as the use of a running hologram to act as a diversion). I got to chew the scenery as the Emperor, called out to witness the birth of a brand new race of super soldiers. I loved playing that role in this film and the sequels - I hope it doesn't look like I'm enjoying it too much as my character marches around with a permanent scowl on his face expressing his displeasure at every opportunity!

This film is a prologue to the "Sorrows of the Spy" series.




Daydreams of Waking Night [C]

by thebiz

Genre: Bizarre Arthouse Fantasia

Duration: 6.5 minutes

BBFC rating: PG - for one use of bad language

This is just terrific! Almost like "Salesman in Wonderland". A fantastical excursion into the mind of a salesman when he drifts off to sleep during a boring meeting (the eye-closing overlay gets things off to a start). Full of memorable images and truly bizarre situations, a lot of the events are surprising and funny, and there's no chance of me giving them away here, but I can say that the custom-made music is outstanding in the way it changes to each circumstance sort of in the same way as in the old cartoons.

This classic won the 15th Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema.



High School Girls: Part 1

&

High School Girls: Part 2

by rposhard

Genre: Pedophile Drama

Duration: 22.5 minutes & just over 22.5 minutes

BBFC ratings:
Part 1: (12) - for adult themes, disturbing scenes and pedophile behaviour
Part 2: (15) - for scenes of a sexual nature, bad language and implied sexual violence


A young girl tells the police her story of how she came to know and be raped by an upstanding psychologist. Meanwhile, in his cell, an interrogator interviews the alleged pedophile. He seems to be corroborating the story. But, an ingenious twist at the end throws everything up in the air! This film has two very performances from the female leads and also from Dr McAvoy, a very memorable character for sure. There's very suspensful music in this film as well. The ending is gripping!



The Dance of Death - Part One (no longer online)

&

The Dance of Death - Part Two (no longer online)

by SGPorsche48

Genre: Kidnap Drama

Duration: 10 minutes & nearly 11.5 minutes

BBFC ratings:
Part One: (15) - for bad language
Part Two: (12) - for mild bad language and some violence

A woman wakes up in a theatre on a stage dressed in a skimpy costume. Her only company is a mysterious voice commanding her to get ready to perform a show ... and there's no way out! The two parts are very different, the first part takes place over a week in the theatre, the second part is told from the husband's perspective as he searches for his wife during the same week. A clever ending ties the two stories together nicely. There's great writing here, especially in Part 1 as the woman and her captor banter with each other, often to blackly hilarious effect!



Alien on Vacation (Music Video) (no longer online)

by Bongoman & "In-Stereo"

Genre: Progressive Rock

Duration: 5 minutes

BBFC rating: U - suitable for all

It's not just the music that's in this one. The visuals are often staggering as we see the main character doing stunts on his hoverboard in and around a deserted city. There's an environmental message in the film as well.



A Very British Sketch Show

by Sparky

Genre: TV Comedy Sketch Show

Duration: nearly 17 minutes

BBFC rating: (15) - for bad language

This is a laugh - it has the typical British TV sketch show format down pat. Fans of "The Fast Show" or "Smack the Pony" or "Harry Enfield" will be familiar with its use of recurring gags and short sketches with the odd big one thrown in (an hilarious finale involving a frustrated AOL customer this time). I believe this was my first proper go at doing comedy characters (well 2 comedy performances and a straight man) - I think it came out alright, but you can never be sure if what you've done is funny or not without a live audience to watch it. Anyway, that aside, there's lots of fun to be had here; the variation on the horse-walks-into-a-bar joke was my personal favourite. Be warned, unlike the typical British TV sketch show, the language in this is much worse - but if you can stomach that, you'll be falling about through much of this...



Super Duper Uber GALAXY FORCE [C]

by MefuneAkira

Genre: Science Fiction Spoof Comedy

Duration: 23 minutes

BBFC rating: (15) - for bad language

An undoubted comedy classic - this one has it all! Even if the Mel Brooks thing doesn't float your boat, watching this is a lesson in how to craft a movie in terms of pacing, editing and the use of reaction shots for comic effect.

But for me, this isn't just the best comedy ever made for TMO (in my own mind and by proxy this archive, it will now always retain that place in history thanks to the closing of TMO), but one of the finest crafted films as well. No doubt that, if I didn't have a role in the film (a pompous admiral which I thoroughly enjoyed playing), it would have easily got my highest award.

"Ramm Zees Ghost"
"I Pwn U Wit Hax Noob"
"Freedom Fighters: Revolution" (Parts I & II)
"Redenzione de Mazza"
"Score Settled"
"Score Settled 2"
"Preachers"
"Nosferatu: Eine Symphonie des Grandes"
"Tasha's Corner Commercial"
"On the Highway with Yahweh"
"The Batman"
"PACMAN FAN!"
"Inbreeding Cousins 2"
"The Break-up Letter"



All films in the vault are available for you to download on request - there are currently 896 to choose from, the latest addition being "Three Lives" by Meowan.

See you next month, Merry Xmas and Happy New Year!

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Pay attention class, this edition of the JazzX Movie Vault includes great animation, great stories, Japanese chicks kicking ***, thoughts on the meaning of existence, a futuristic look at religion, Japanese chicks kicking butt, an exploration of the death penalty, Japanese chicks kicking derierre and more Japanese chicks executing perfect special moves against someone's backside.

Welcome to December 2007!


December 2007 Highlights


XTREME HIGH SCHOOL + (Japanese with English subtitles) (not online)

MOST XTREME HIGH SCHOOL + (Japanese with English subtitles) (not online)

XTREME HIGH SCHOOL: 3rd IMPACT (Part 1) (Japanese with English subtitles) (not online)

by Sidy

Genre: Japanese Super Hero

Durations: nearly 6 minutes, 7 minutes and 15.5 minutes respectively

BBFC ratings:
/PG\ - for frequent cartoon violence
/PG\ - for frequent cartoon violence
U - suitable for all

These are a fantastic watch!
It begins with two schoolgirls fighting over a boy in high school. Very quickly, it becomes apparent that both of them are skilled in advanced martial arts, including conjuring up fireballs and turning their fists and feet into flames at will! Yes, it's like watching a game of Street Fighter ...  but with the female characters always winning! The animation and sound design are astounding; you really feel all the big impacts when the girls turn on the style.

In the next one, the girls (who are now best friends) have become teachers at their former school - but an unruly pupil needs to be taught a lesson (yes - another female with superpowers)! Cue more great fun as physical discipline is once more brought back into the classroom!

In "3rd Impact" (named after the 3rd revision of the videogame "Street Fighter III"), an alien foe attacks the Earth. Both the girls, later joined by their foe from part 2 (and a lad who can barely get his fireball up) combine powers to stop the plasma attack in progress. Waiting in the wings is a monkey from the "Oh It's On" series (by mixmasterfestus) - apparently the alien menace wants to destroy Earth as a way of getting back at him. The animation in this episode is just incredible for a The Movies film - if you only have time to watch one of them, watch this.

Time flies by when watching these films, never a dull moment. All the elements that make up a movie are put perfectly in place in every episode.
Something I didn't spot first time around is just how well the parts are acted - in addition to the brilliant use of The Movies gestures during the reaction shots (my favourite being when one character shows her disappointment at her exam results in "MOST"!)

This is top notch entertainment. Often very funny as well as dazzlingly beautiful to look at.
Your homework is to watch these films, no excuses will be accepted.




From one pair of Japanese kick-ass chicks to another:



Aya and Yumi: Yumi's Journal (not online)

by madone69

Genre: Character Study/Series Recap

Duration: 9.5 minutes

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for some mildly violent scenes


Aya and Yumi are a couple of lasses who've learned fighting skills in order to double-handedly rid their town of gangs. These gangs often go around in halloween costumes as they perpetrate their crimes ("The Scream Queens", "The Horrorshows" etc.)

I was struck from watching my first Aya and Yumi film, episode 5, at how superbly well the friendship between the two characters was realised.

For me, Aya and Yumi are the best defined friendship I've watched in 3 years - they goof about and argue like friends do, but they're always there for each other. And all that achieved using only subtitles.

In this film, Yumi gives an account, via her diary, of the story so far (a great way into the story if you know nothing about it). She also documents how she met Aya and why they got on so well.
At the end of the film, they have a hilarious battle over the TV; the show they're supposed to be watching is by Sidy (see above!)

I've uploaded this film with the permission of the filmmaker, I hope they'll join TMU and upload all the other episodes of Aya and Yumi; the two I've seen are terrific!



Extinguished (not online)

by josephkw

Genre: Science Fiction Death Row Action Drama

Duration: 27.5 minutes

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for action violence


A space cruiser takes 3 condemned prisoners to the edge of a black hole where they await being loaded into pods before being "extinguished" by means of expulsion into the abyss.

This sets the scene for an exploration of the death penalty and indeed religious questions about the nature of the soul; also onboard the ship is the requesite preacher who begins by interviewing each of the condemned. Fascinatingly, even he is condemned - but by a terminal illness which gives him about a month to live.

We get to know the characters and why they were sentenced to such an expensive fate; why not just shoot them?  The answer is that the predominating religion on their planet of origin believes that not even a soul can escape from a black hole, it's therefore the worst form of death penalty possible. That's why, at one point in the film, the prisoners are threatened by the Captain with being shot if they try anything ... by guns set to "stun".

In order of appearance, the condemned are:

A murderer - the usual penalty is probably shooting - but he killed a Senator's daughter and some strings were pulled to give him the ultimate penalty,

A drug addict - who took the only escape pod on her ship during a crisis (while she was high), condemning the rest of her crew to be sucked into a black hole (and therefore have their souls extinguished),

A scientist - who invented a weapon of mass destruction which he sold to an enemy power resulting in the deaths of 250 000 people.


I'll tell you that one of these three survives at the end of the film - place your bets and watch to find out!

A fascinating film with plenty of surprises  - this is the kind of film that you watch several times, picking up more nuances on each occasion.


See all the featured films at:
The JazzX Movie Channel


Also archived this month:

"A Split Second"
"Bill Cluck: Car Salesman"
"Apartment 4C"
"A Day to Forget"
"It's Not as Bad as it Looks: A Year in the Life of a Space Commie Nazi Fleet - Part One: The New Recruits"



There are now 928 films in the archive, the latest addition being "Rochelle, Rochelle" by BiggsTrek

See you next month!  

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Before I get down to business this month, here's my new review for the improved audio synch version of "Last Rites - Et Spiriti Sancti" (part 3 in the series):

Last Rites: Et Spiriti Sancti (improved audio synch version)

by tmunderg (aka. kuroken)

Genre: Religious Apocalypse Detective Thriller

Duration: 26.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (15) - for bad language and intense violence

Last Rites will be featured in the vault imminently (as soon as I've watched the final part again, prepared my comment on the whole series and uploaded some of the other featured films).

See you very soon!

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