goofparade:

Holy Frijole Jazzx, I've only ever made two crappy little movies and you picked them both! Haha.

I KNEW that voodoo mind control spell thingy I purchased in Port O' Prince would pay off in the long run!. ...the guy did say that it may take a while though...

...

Hmmm - I thought getting reviews by sorcery and witchcraft was banned here. How can anyone take me seriously now, when all they need to do is say "abracadabra" and - hey presto! - 5-stars on a plate ... and a place in the archive.

---

Will you continue with 2007 movies?

---

Horror western A New World season 2 episode final online
http://movies.lionhead.com/studio/samyhouse

300 films?My,how can you have room for all these?

---

Mail Call!

samyhouse:

Will you continue with 2007 movies?

Of course!

It's January 2007 next month and it's full of classics!

---

Disney2000 Studios:

300 films?My,how can you have room for all these?

Well, nearly 600 actually ...

They take up 6.5 GB of my secondary hard drive (the one I use for games). Every month, they get backed up onto an external hard drive along with the rest of the contents of my computer.

At some point I'll have to offload them onto CD or DVD, but there's still quite a bit of space left (enough for another 600 films). I'll probably offload them when I reach 1000 films. They'll still be available of course.

---

This month we cast our minds back to January 2007 - an extremely rich crop of TMO movies were harvested into my archive. Are you ready? Then let's go!:


January 2007 Highlights


[C] = classic must-watch film (and there's plenty of them)


To be sure, we begin with the tale of a black Irish leprechaun and his chosen bride:

The Leprechaun's Bride

by mildheadwound

Genre: Stoner (thanks Goofparade!)

Duration: 22 minutes - released 1st January 2007, 58 ratings, 4.9 star average

BBFC rating: (15) - for frequent bad language

This is another zonked out film - in many ways, like last month's "Long Road", a classic of its genre. It also stars quite a few well known TMO actresses. I could go on, but this film defies description. The modding is up there with anything we have in today's films.




A Photograph Lasts a Lifetime

by sweatyshoulder

Genre: Horror Thriller

Duration: nearly 21.5 minutes - released 20th December 2006, 175 ratings, 4.69 star average

BBFC rating: [18] - for graphic violence


A superior horror with some really acting and writing.



There is a Santa Claus

by monkeybiz

Genre: Visual Poem

Duration: 4.5 minutes - released 5th January 2007, 28 ratings, 4.46 star rating

BBFC rating: (U) - suitable for all


This film answers the religious question "is there a Santa Claus?" - the answer given by the narrator is "yes" - otherwise there would be no love or morality in the world. It is a thoughtful piece of work adequately summed up by the end of my 5-star review: "...this film got me thinking. That's a gift alot of people need Santa to deliver right now."



Disappearing Horse

by That_Guy_Who_Every1_Loves

Genre: Comedy

Duration: 3 minutes - released Sunday 26th November, 5 ratings, 4.2 star average

BBFC rating: (U) - suitable for all


This film has a horse that torments the main character by disappearing and reappearing at random. The main character resorts to extreme measures (like getting himself locked up in jail) to get away from the horse. Needless to say, the punchline is excellent. A daft film that pushes all the right buttons - the comic timing is great. And only 5 people have seen this gem!


 
Stolen Death - Chapter one: West (German w. English subtitles) [C]

Stolen Death - Chapter two: South (German w. English subtitles) [C]

Stolen Death - Chapter three: North (German w. English subtitles) [C]

Stolen Death - Chapter four: East (German w. English subtitles) [C] (banned on TMO - link leads to external site)

by sisch

Genre: Science Fiction Thriller

Duration:
just over 11 minutes, nearly 11 minutes, just over 11 minutes & 13.5 minutes
- released, Friday 13th October 2006, Friday 27th October 2006, Friday 17th November 2006, late December 2006
- 154 ratings, 4.92 star average; 112 ratings, 4.96 star average; 102 ratings, 4.97 star average; no information

BBFC ratings: Chapters 1-3 (15) - for graphic action violence. Chapter 4 [18] - for one scene of graphic sexuality and nudity.


So now we come to TMO's answer to The Bionic Woman - but enough about the filmmaker, let's talk about the film ... (haha - get's them every time!)

This is a classic science fiction thriller. A woman wakes up to find she is seemingly a born killer and must unlock the secrets of her past (and, boy!, do they get unlocked!?) - cracking action, thoughtful character stuff and amazing special effects, with music and excellent acting throughout the three-quarters-of-an-hour running time. They don't come much better than this. Winner of the 7th Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema, and deservedly so.

I am dismayed to see that Activision pulled the 4th chapter just because it had one sex scene in it - this scene is in no way gratuitous (even though the characters are nude and there's no doubt what they are up to) and serves an important purpose to the plot (you'll see why when you watch it). When will these people realise that sex isn't bad!? ... Otherwise none of us would be here to ban it!

Anyway, click the film's name above and you should get to the external site where it is now hosted - alternatively just ask, and ye shall get from my archive.



Poetry of Plague: Dino Edit

Poetry of Plague: Cows

Poetry of Plague: Office Hijinks

Poetry of Plague: The Permission Slip

by God_Of_Plague

Genre: Comedic Poetry

Duration:
just over 0.5 minutes, 1 minute, 1 minute, 1 minute
- released Sat 6th, Mon 8th, Wed 10th and Tue 23rd of January 2007
- 29 ratings, 4.48 star average; 37 ratings, 4.73 star average; 17 ratings, 4.82 star average; 22 ratings, 4.59 star average

BBFC ratings: Dino Edit & The Permission Slip (U) - suitable for all. Cows & Office Hijinks /PG\ - for mild insults


In these short poems, we are treated to some funny lines, excellent comedy timing from the actor and the visuals that accompany him. Funny overlays are a large feature of this series as well.



Trouble With Triffids

by StokeStudios

Genre: Horror Sci-fi

Duration: 12.5 minutes - released Thursday 11th January 2007, 71 ratings, 4.97 star average


The best feature of this film is some excellent visual FX for the triffids. They've obviously stayed in my mind for a whole year. Worth seeing.



The Truth of Mars: Part I (not online)

The Truth of Mars: The Dream of the Pundit Banal (not online)

The Truth of Mars 2: Speck in the Eye of God (not online)

by bongoman

Genre: Psychadelic Sci-fi

Duration: 8 minutes, 4 minutes, 6.5 minutes
- released Thursday 26th October, Sunday 29th October and 9th December 2006
- 25 ratings, 4.64 star average; 30 ratings, 4.83 star average; 12 ratings, 4.92 star average

BBFC rating: Part I & The Dream of the Pundit Banal (U) - Suitable for all. Speck in the Eye of God /PG\ - for some violence

In this ultra chilled-out series (don't be fooled by the titles - watch in the order shown), we are treated to some of the best special effects seen in any TMO film. The screen is always populated by very colourful characters (literally!) and some of the mods (well, most actually) have to be seen to be believed (for example, there's a planet exploding and it's utterly convincing). All music is made by the director and is excellent.
The character of The Pundit Banal (a kind of interstellar guru) must surely be the most chilled-out character in any TMO film. "Space Stoner" would be an alternative genre description for this series.



Gathering Little Mushrooms

by Barbar23

Genre: Dark Fairytale

Duration: 9 minutes - released Wednesday 10th January 2007, 118 ratings, 4.83 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for scenes of horror


This is a sort of TMO version of Alice in Wonderland. It has beautiful mods and a well created fairytale atmosphere. Its message could be seen, as in many of the dark messages found in fairytales, as one of anti-drugs or anti-temptation.
 
 

The Christmas Beard

by Movie-Mad

Genre: Festive Comedy

Duration: 12 minutes - released Saturday 6th January 2007, 28 ratings, 4.61 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for occasional fairly bad language


This remains the best christmas-themed comedy on TMO. The gags are of a quality usually only seen in British TV programmes like Peep Show or Spaced. The character of Socrates is just excellent. All his stupid pseudo-intellectual pontifications have a quirky logic to them and it's very well acted (including by the supporting cast). This film should be compulsive viewing every Christmas!




Scramble (Part Two) [C]

by postmodernchuck

Genre: Psychological Sci-fi Thriller

Duration: 24 minutes - released 29th January 2007, 95 ratings, 4.95 star average

BBFC rating: [18] - for graphic violence and graphic sexuality


The conclusion to postmodernchuck's classic thriller which I talked about last month. A story that ties you in mental knots + I get to be naked with TWO leading ladies in this episode [result!] (and I'm pleased this film hasn't been pulled yet - unlike the unfortunate conclusion to "Stolen Death" mentioned above).
I may be biased, but I'm pretty sure it's no bull when I say this is DEFINITELY a classic film.



Also archived this month:

"A Kat's Tale"
"Super Vixen!!!"
"Father Christmas"
"In a Lane"
"Santa and Mr Hyde"
"The Wilson Green Monologues - Santa Banter"
"Between Life and Death --- D's Kin"
"The Return of the Desperado"
"To Kill a Zombie"
"The Passage (Prologue)"
"Phantom Squad I"
"Phantom Squad II: Betrayal"
"From the Stars"
"How to Catch an Online Predator"
"Number B - The D's Letter"
"Carrie I - Bloodsport"
"Carrie II - Prom Night"


As usual, all these films are available on request. There are now 621 films in the archive, the latest addition being "The Armor of God" by simpsdog.



Phew! January 2007 was one hell of a month for great films ... February 2007 has more classics as well, see you next month if not before!

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Thats a batch of flicks...Leprechauns Bride is near the tops for me, Plagues poetry is classic as are a many more.  I watched Triffids yesterday and was struck by how the music was.  Might have to get that Bongoman series from ya soon (and thanks for blackbird..great stuff).   Keep it up.

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Teaser out now

thebiz:

Thats a batch of flicks...Leprechauns Bride is near the tops for me, Plagues poetry is classic as are a many more.  I watched Triffids yesterday and was struck by how the music was.  Might have to get that Bongoman series from ya soon (and thanks for blackbird..great stuff).   Keep it up.

Looking back over that list, the best mods are in bongoman's series. Here's another example: dead bodies rotating in space at different distances from the camera and all at different speeds. Astounding.

I borrowed two of his dazzling planetary flybys for a couple of early scenes in "The God Illusion" - an over-the-moon revealing Earth shot and a close flyby through the atmosphere of Saturn (it's a documentary cliche that whenever someone talks about science, the visuals must be of outer space or the moon! So I used that for my own documentary). I believe these were actually designed during bongoman's Truth of Mars phase (there's plenty of planetary flybys in there).

Anyway - if you're into serious moddery, then I recommend you ask me for these (the music's great too - a kind of "space rock" [Pink Floyd-ish] - very professional sounding).

---

So - this month we whizz back to February 2007 for more TMO treats. Another special delivery courtesy of the JazzX Movie Vault

February 2007 Highlights

[C] = classic must-watch film


Heart Vision

by Dulci

Genre: Character Study

Duration: 3 minutes - released Tuesday 30th January 2007, 54 ratings, 4.91 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for violent scenes


Unrequited love is the subject of this solo acting tour-de-force. Superbly written - it's a real weepy.




Cleopatra (A Game for the Gods)

by TheMGMKid1

Genre: Historical Epic

Duration: 20 minutes - released Saturday 27th January 2007, 257 ratings, 4.82 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for scenes of a violent nature


Part I of an ambitious historical epic - it has sumptuous visuals and a terrific score by Admultosanos - so that I described it in my review as best original TMO score ever!




Special Delivery

by BerkleyJL

Genre: Teen Comedy

Duration: 12.5 minutes - released Wednesday 31st January, 112 ratings, 4.88 star average

BBFC rating: (U) - suitable for all


Teen comedy heaven! This one has it all - stupid mix-ups which create hilarity, a music video-style montage (and the music is excellent throughout), a transvestite (!) and great acting.




The Passage - Episode One: Rite of Passage [C]

by josephkw

Genre: Military Sci-fi

Duration: nearly 9.5 minutes - released Saturday 3rd February 2007, 157 ratings, 4.87 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for scenes of military combat


TMO's answer to new-style Battlestar Galactica. It opens with a brilliant space battle before going on to some interesting character-based stuff. The vast majority of characters in this film have the same name as the person playing them - a neat little device that helps to identify who's who.
There'll be more from this series in the next two editions of the JazzX Movie Vault...




Super Random Events

by Video_Capture

Genre: Bizarre Comedy

Duration: just over 2.5 minutes - released Saturday 28th October 2006, 17 ratings, 4.59 star average

BBFC rating: (12) - for some scenes of a violent nature


This little-known comedy came courtesy of the random movie button. The opening gag with the vending machine that won't cough up the s is hilarious. There's some other gags too in this shorty - very well edited throughout. Don't be put off watching it because of "Fresh Sneakers".




Xtreme Taxi (YouTube only)

&

Xtreme Taxi x2 (YouTube only) [C]

by sidy

Genre: Car Chase

Duration: 5.5 minutes and just over 4.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (12) - for infrequent bad language (both episodes)


These brilliant car chase films are no longer on TMO. The first one is in a way more impressive than the second one as it was made before stunts and effects. Both films are an intense ride which will get your heart racing, some great comic book touches and a smattering of humour as well. Still for my money, the best car chase films made with The Movies.





Wiwanyank Wacipi - La Danse du Soleil (aka "Wiwanyank Wacipi - The Sundance") (French w. English subtitles) (Not online) [C]

by cinecitta

Genre: Mystical Road Movie

Duration: 17.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (15) - for graphic violence


The first in what has become a classic series - the latest winner of my highest (and only) award, the 18th Prufrock Award for Outstanding Cinema.
It all begins with a man being stranded in the desert and left high and dry by his boss. A superbly made film with great performances from the French cast. You just don't know where the story will take you next.




Into the Shadow - Part 1: Overture [C]

&

Into the Shadow - Part 2: A Questionable Dame [C]

by sherwinliu

Genre: Old-style Noir Detective

Duration:
nearly 7 minutes - released Saturday 10th February 2007, 167 ratings, 4.9 star average
15.5 minutes - released Saturday 24th February 2007, 114 ratings, 4.94 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for intense scenes (both episodes)


The classics keep on coming! This is a near-perfect realising of those dark old detective films. Beautifully atmospheric done in black and white throughout. Great performances too, especially from the person who plays Detective Jenson in part 2, he stole the film (lol - just kidding). These are true TMO classics with great music and acting from all concerned, and from a studio that can do no wrong ("Dignity of Men" anyone?).



The Author Who Really Wasn't

by sparrowtm

Genre: Bizarre Horror

Duration: 7.5 minutes - released Friday 9th December 2005, 104 ratings, 4.36 star average

BBFC rating: /PG\ - for mild horror, mild expletives and adult themes


This is another very film courtesy of the random movie button - in this one, a would-be author finds herself unwillingly (and unwittingly) writing a skeleton into her new romance novel. It's great fun, with superb pre-stunts and effects camera shots. The female lead gives a top class performance.



Attack of the Garden Gnomes (Not online)

by Master007

Genre: Comedy Creature Feature

Duration: 10.5 minutes

BBFC rating: (12) - for scenes of horror and violence


A bit of a cult classic B-movie here. The best bit is a superb "gnome's-eye view" sequence as we follow the gnome as it sneaks past a man eating pizza on the sofa and into the kitchen. It also has a great performance by the lead actress (she's got the Southern accent down pat).



A New World: The Beginning (Episode 1) (French w. English subtitles)

A New World: The Manor (Episode 2) (French w. English Subtitles) (Not online)

A New World: Minus 2 (Episode 3) (French w. English Subtitles) (Not online)

A New World: A Question of Faith (Episode 4) (French w. English Subtitles) (Not online)

A New World: About the Zombies (Episode 5) (French w. English Subtitles) (Not online)

&

A New World: Apocalypse (Episode 6) (French w. English Subtitles) (Not online)

by samyhouse

Genre: Gothic Horror

Duration:
7 minutes - released Monday 27th November 2006, 94 ratings, 4.84 star average
8 minutes, 10 minutes, nearly 8 minutes, 7.5 minutes and 9 minutes

BBFC rating:
(12) - for scenes of horror and mild sexuality
(15) - for bad language
[18] - for extreme graphic violence, implied extreme sexual violence and nudity
[18] - for graphic violence and nudity
[18] - for extreme gore and violence
[18] - for extreme gore and violence


An interesting premise - Zombies are decemating the cities which means vampires are running out of human blood!

Zombies, vampires, a manor in the middle of the forest, and a collection of humans to pick off one by one when they're forced to go inside and meet an enigmatic Count Dracula type of character - what's not to like?
Blood, gore and violence, severed limbs and heads (and that all happens to just one of the main characters!) - For a taster, in episode 3 we see a disgusting drowning scene (must be one of the worst murder scenes in The Movies history) in which we see a half-naked woman who has clearly been violated, blood oozing out of her private region, the drowning takes a full 60 seconds, no sound effect or camera angle left out!
But, told in an interesting non-linear fashion, there's no question this is a great series with terrific camerawork and performances to boot. There's even a small prison drama and a historical epic thrown in.
This one has the lot - but be warned, it is not for the squeamish! It has a superb opening as well (I won't spoil it).

    


Also archived this month:

"Space Pirates"
"The Perfect Soldier"
"The Prop ShoW"
"Dust in the Wind: Alive and Well (Part I)"
"Dust in the Wind: Alive and Well (Part II)"
"Dust in the Wind: Alive and Well (Part III)"
"Graveyard Spirit"
"Bloody Mary - Part 1"
"Bloody Mary - Part 2"
"Bloody Mary - Part 3"


So ends another bumper month for great TMO films, all available from my archive (and quite a few can't easily be found anywhere else now).
There are now 657 films in the archive, the latest addition being the superb "Wiwanyank Wacipi - The Sundance - Part 3" by cinecitta.


See you next month if not before!
 

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i am very impressed with the work you are doing here and you deserve a lot of praise... i will defenitely have u store my upcoming film as a backup, you doing a great job here. keep it up.

Violent scenes?  In one of my movies?  /halo

I look forward to this thread each month!

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TMU Blog * My Blog

Wow I am so happy and honored to see that you mention my horror serie I didn't thought you would talk about it, that's a very surprised. I have to say that I am really happy to see that some people remembers some of my movies. For those who wants to watch the complete season 1, here's a link: http://www.freewebs.com/samyhouse/anewworldseason1.htm

Just to inform you in case you didn't know, A 2nd season have been done and the season is now complete (with all episodes online). From the reviews it get, this second season seems not as as 1st one, but a 3rd season is on the work as a special Vampire spin off.

 

Anyway, see you next time for the next movie vault

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Horror western A New World season 2 episode final online
http://movies.lionhead.com/studio/samyhouse

dboy204:

i am very impressed with the work you are doing here and you deserve a lot of praise... i will defenitely have u store my upcoming film as a backup, you doing a great job here. keep it up.

Erm - it doesn't quite work like that.

All the films that score 4-stars or more get into the archive.

Generously, I allow complete series into the vault if even one film manages 4 stars (no point just having one episode of a series).

The easiest way for your film to get into the vault is to put it up for review in my open review thread. If it scores 4 or more, it automatically gets put into the vault.

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Heya' Jazz, any chance ya' could upload "Wiwanyank Wacipi - La Danse du Soleil" to rapidshare and throw me a link? I've watched the second and third parts, but would like to see the first before I leave a review for them.

- Orky

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dulci:

Violent scenes?  In one of my movies?  /halo

I look forward to this thread each month!

Hehe - even though she only imagines throttling her and throwing her over the bar, it still counts!

Nice film - I'd forgotton about that one, a pleasant surprise when I watched it again the other day.

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ah i see i misread well dont wory my next project should get at least 4 stars from you anyway

i mean just check out the tech demo to see the kind of stuff we are working on here.

samyhouse:

Wow I am so happy and honored to see that you mention my horror serie I didn't thought you would talk about it, that's a very surprised. I have to say that I am really happy to see that some people remembers some of my movies. For those who wants to watch the complete season 1, here's a link: http://www.freewebs.com/samyhouse/anewworldseason1.htm

Just to inform you in case you didn't know, A 2nd season have been done and the season is now complete (with all episodes online). From the reviews it get, this second season seems not as as 1st one, but a 3rd season is on the work as a special Vampire spin off.

 

Anyway, see you next time for the next movie vault

Just thinking about some of those scenes in A New World makes me want to puke! job.

If you want me to watch season 2, just put it in my open review thread - that's kind of how I bookmark films.

I tried the link on the ANW episode 1 film page to the other films in the series, but it didn't work - so thanks for posting the new link here (maybe update the film's page?)!

I've a feeling we'll be seeing you again next month ("Dark Thriller")

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dboy204:

ah i see i misread well dont wory my next project should get at least 4 stars from you anyway

i mean just check out the tech demo to see the kind of stuff we are working on here.

Street Fighter kind of stuff - I like it. (Check out sidy's Xtreme High School films - or even mixmasterfestus's Oh it's On series)

However, you better make sure that you name your musicians in the finished film (preferably with a track listing) or it'll be one-starred and most certainly won't be going in the archive. Even if you have permission, I expect to see names. It's only polite.

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i am one of the musicians, the guitarist lol, me and my band play that song
and its kinda like street fighter in the fighting sense but not really, it has a story behind it basically lol.

OD-Ork-Boy:

Heya' Jazz, any chance ya' could upload "Wiwanyank Wacipi - La Danse du Soleil" to rapidshare and throw me a link? I've watched the second and third parts, but would like to see the first before I leave a review for them.

- Orky

Uploading now Orky!

The first part's very important in setting up the revenge scene in part 3 - so choice sir!

I'll PM you the link, and post it here too.

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dboy204:

i am one of the musicians, the guitarist lol, me and my band play that song
and its kinda like street fighter in the fighting sense but not really, it has a story behind it basically lol.

Wow - great sound!

Give yourselves some credit then! Otherwise somebody might come along and flag it by mistake (I usually settle just for one star [see ... I'm a softy at heart]- but others aren't so generous).

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thanks alot man we have been doing gigs up and down the country and have been trying to get signed but no success so far :/ back on topic: i hope to see my film going into your vault later this year after it hopefully recieves at least a 4 star rating

jazzx:

OD-Ork-Boy:

Heya' Jazz, any chance ya' could upload "Wiwanyank Wacipi - La Danse du Soleil" to rapidshare and throw me a link? I've watched the second and third parts, but would like to see the first before I leave a review for them.

- Orky

Uploading now Orky!

The first part's very important in setting up the revenge scene in part 3 - so choice sir!

I'll PM you the link, and post it here too.

Your order has arrived!

For anyone else who wants to see the beginning of a fantastic series, here is the download link for:

Wiwanyank Wacipi - La Danse du Soleil - Part 1

It will remain active until 90 days after the most recent download.

---

dboy204:

thanks alot man we have been doing gigs up and down the country and have been trying to get signed but no success so far :/ back on topic: i hope to see my film going into your vault later this year after it hopefully recieves at least a 4 star rating

Even if it has no story but uses flashy visuals and your own band (I love it when people use their own band in their films [as long as they're - ]) and plenty of fights!, I can imagine it'll make the grade. Unless I hear some disastrous mic-popping in the VO, or the sound synch bug hits and ruins the film - but you wouldn't put up with that, would you? (Check out my "5-stars (Music Video)" for the film which solved that bug in a huge way - you also get to hear my minimum standard for your singer's vocals ).

Anyway - I hope your search for fame and fortune brings fruit.

Jazz (surprise, surprise) is my thing - but I recently joined a Soul-funk-latin band full time ("Casa del Funk") - great fun.

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jazzx:

Jazz (surprise, surprise) is my thing - but I recently joined a Soul-funk-latin band full time ("Casa del Funk") - great fun.

Fun like a TMO collaboration? Or fun where the singer has to "deviate from the main melody and improvise"?
Just curious mate.

Norrie